Your Daily Loser - Where's the best place to teach someone to drive? A smooth, flat stretch of road without a lot of cars would be nice, right? And nevermind if that stretch of road has planes taking off and landing on it... they'll be sure to get out of the way. The son of the airport's manager decided to give his girlfriend a driving lesson. On the runway. His father has since been suspended. The Story.
Jury Duty - And you thought Post-It Notes were harmless... truth is, they are accessories to evil. Walter Healey of Troy, New York, used his Post-Its to record the social security numbers of the thousands of people he planned to abuse for his identity theft scheme. It's bad enough that Healey worked for the state's Tax Department. But I guess that was just good training for his future misconduct. The Story. // The Mugshot. (Healey's in the middle.)
You may have heard the warnings that people become more depressed in the winter months because of a lack of sunlight. Now researchers are saying that too much sunlight can be just as bad. The study shows that a lack of sleep is the real culprit. It all comes down to maintaining your circadian rhythm. You can read more about the sunlight issue here, and you can find out what a circadian rhythm is here.
Turtle Huntin’; Batesville, Ind.: Turtle Huntin’ offers you “the ultimate outdoor adventure,” through guided turtle hunting instruction and hunts. You can read all about turtle hunting at their website, but for a “minor charge” you too can turtle hunt like the pros. Turtle Huntin' Link fixed 2333 May, 9, 2009.
Garbage Clocks; Evanston, Ill: An Evanston man has been featured by CBS Sunday Morning and Thrillist for his clocks made out of garage sale junk. His clocks are available for purchase on Etsy. Thrillist
131 Years of Prayer; La Crosse, Wisc: At the Adoration Chapel of the Franciscan Sisters of Perpetual Adoration in La Crosse, Wisconsin; the Sisters have prayed at a consecrated host, the Holy Eucharist, for the past 131 years. Since 1878 the Sisters have prayed at the Holy Eucharist in shifts around the clock. Milwaukee Journal Sentinel
11 Year Old Steals Car; St. Cloud, Minn.: An 11 year old was arrested in St. Cloud Minnesota for stealing a car in Waite Park, Minnesota and driving it to the next town. Charges are pending. WCCO
Shoplifter Wrote Address On Job App; Dayton, Ohio: A man shoplifting at a clothing store filled out a job application with his real address before he left and set off the alarms. Chicago Tribune via the Associated Press.
Another BB Gun Robbery, Deadly; Chicago Ill: Ernesto Garcia decided to use a BB gun to rob a gas station. The weapon looked like a real handgun. So, one can assume that the police thought it was real when he refused to put it down. Garcia was shot eight times by the Chicago Police Officer. Garcia was a suspect in 25 other robberies. Chicago Tribune
In Hampton, VA a 38 year old man faces jail time after an incident involving his 2 year old daughter on Wednesday morning. Police arrived at his house at 2:17 am after receiving a report of a domestic disturbance and caught him outside his house with sharp objects in his hands. The man ran back into the house and later comes running out the back door with his pants ablaze and his daughter in his arms. He released the child and then made a run for it before, soon afterwards, being caught by police. Daily Press
Joliet's Finest Represent!: While at a conference for the International Police Mountain Bike Association in New Mexico, Officer John Hanke, with three other officers, decided that three drinks wasn't enough to impair his ability to drive. Bonus: It was a government vehicle. Double bonus money quote: "They allowed a sober person in the vehicle to take possession of it and did not tow the vehicle," Herald News
Rosemont Police were surprised at the number and type of drug arrests at the Grateful Dead shows Monday and Tuesday at the All-State Arena. You mean people still drop and sell acid at Dead shows? We'd never have guessed. Daily Herald
Life Imitates Ar...er, Sports: Apparently there weren't enough fights at the hockey game, so Stanley Drasky, 41, started one with his wife in the parking lot after the game. Not to be outdone, Mrs. Drasky decided hubby didn't need to be in that squad car and went for the door more than once, pushing the officer away when he tried to close it. We all know what happened next. Chicago Sun-Times
The Illinois River doesn't seem very safe to Jet Ski in. Just ask Tad Newell, who was knocked off his Jet Ski by an asian carp. Luckily, Tad thought ahead when he packed his cellphone and thus was able to call for a rescue when he couldn't get the Jet Ski restarted. Peoria Journal-Star
Paul Di Filippo
Paul has been paid to put weird ideas into fictional form for over thirty years, in his career as a noted science fiction writer. He has recently begun blogging on many curious topics with three fellow writers at The Inferior 4+1.
Chuck is the purveyor of News of the Weird, the syndicated column which for decades has set the gold-standard for reporting on oddities and the bizarre.
Our banner was drawn by the legendary underground cartoonist Rick Altergott.