I would just like to take this opportunity to say what a swell job all the new contributors are doing! You have all been trained well in the "Chuck Shepherd School for Weirdos," graduating with honors. And a round of applause to Alex for thinking up this new forum and getting it off the ground!
According to The Salt Lake Tribune, Dave Snarr, the Mayor of Murray, Utah may be losing his trademark handlebar mustache. Mr. Snarr has put the fate of his mustache up for a public vote and so far, it is not looking good for this favorite facial feature.
According to the letter, written by American Mustache Institute CEO Dr. Abraham Jonas Froman:
"...you represent a community of downtrodden Americans - Mustached Americans - for whom you stand as a sign that we are not only fit to hold positions in waste collection, motorcycle repair, and hospital equipment maintenance. You are proof that a Mustached American can be a mayor, a leader, a respected beacon of excellence."
The Mayor's response? "...whatever you do, you're damned".
Voting for the fate of the mustache is open until May 16th.
But apparently he's just as scary. A woman from Abbeville, Louisiana has filed a lawsuit against Wal-Mart because the local store allowed their pet Nutria to run loose without alerting the shoppers. Rebecca White was so freaked out when she spotted Norman that she jumped back and her cart rolled over her foot, breaking two bones. This begs a number of questions... What's a Nutria? It's a large furry rodent (pictured, right). Why was one running around the store? Why did the employees name him Norman? And what the heck did she have in her cart that was so heavy? You can read more about it here.
Your Daily Loser - A former exotic dancer was caught with her pants (or should I say G-string) down in California awhile back. Seems that Nicole Faller of Pleasanton is a bit absent-minded when she's high on methamphetamine. You see, she set up a video camera to record herself having sex with an older man, but unfortunately his heart couldn't take the excitement and he died. So Nicole went through his things, took whatever she decided was valuable along with the rest of his drugs and split... leaving the camera behind. The Story.
Jury Duty - Peter Addison, on the left and Mark Ridgeway, on the right, broke into a charity campsite and trashed the place. How were they caught? Peter had the not-so-good sense to write "Peter Addison was here!" on the white board... I'm sure this is not what his mother had in mind when she told him "My son, someday you will leave your mark on this world!" The Story. // The Mugshot.
In this series, I bring to you the weirdness of Illinois. This is kind of what Chuck does, but restricted to the good ol' state of Illinois. For my first offering, I present the following...
The town of Joliet likes its rodeo. So much that it wants to bring it back NO MATTER WHAT. The catch? A little agency known as the Environmental Protection Agency, who raised a stink when they observed Joliet failed to get the necessary permits for last year's rodeo, at the LANDFILL. The EPA is concerned about damage to the landfill inflicted last year, such as damaging the clay "cap" that seals in all things oozing and disgusting. But once those permits get signed, the rodeo is ON! On I tell you! Joliet Herald News
Many of you may have heard of the Amphicar, the classic half boat, half car that did neither job well, but at least it looked good not doing its job. The same could not be said about the 2009 WaterCar Amphibious, however. Supposedly styled after the 2002 Camaro convertible, it looks more like someone welded the front half of a Dodge Ram truck to the back half of a Chevrolet Corvette, and then replaced the chassis with the bottom of a speedboat. The link contains several pictures of the vehicle on land as well as in the water.
Paul Di Filippo
Paul has been paid to put weird ideas into fictional form for over thirty years, in his career as a noted science fiction writer. He has recently begun blogging on many curious topics with three fellow writers at The Inferior 4+1.
Chuck is the purveyor of News of the Weird, the syndicated column which for decades has set the gold-standard for reporting on oddities and the bizarre.
Our banner was drawn by the legendary underground cartoonist Rick Altergott.