Weird Universe

May 7, 2009

Your Daily Loser & Jury Duty for May 7th

Your Daily Loser - Ishmael Makone of Johannesburg, South Africa, paid the ultimate price for his stupidity. Apparently noone bothered to warn Makone that it's a really bad idea to be underneath the structure you're trying to tear down, even though the article claims dozens of witnesses had been watching him for days and worrying about his safety.

Jury Duty - This has to be the happiest drunk guy to ever end up in jail. Chris Carter of St. Petersburg, Florida, doesn't seem to mind that he was cited for violating his parole, driving under the influence and holding an open container of alcohol. The Mugshot.

Posted By: Nethie | Date: Thu May 07, 2009 | Comments (12)
Category: Death, Your Daily Jury Duty, Your Daily Loser, Alcohol, Goofs and Screw-ups

Not Sure Cleaning Up Spilled Beer Is My Idea Of Fun

You’ll make even the most functional chore fun when you use this collectible iron hand painted Bottle Opener cast from turn-of-the-century British mold! You can buy this and other Bottle Spillers, er, Openers, from Design Toscanoimage
Posted By: qualityleashdog | Date: Thu May 07, 2009 | Comments (5)
Category: Shopping


Posted By: Paul | Date: Thu May 07, 2009 | Comments (7)
Category: Humor, Parody, Movies, Cartoons, War, 1960's

Who’s Yehudi?

Posted By: Paul | Date: Thu May 07, 2009 | Comments (2)
Category: Movies, Music, Sexuality, Surrealism, 1940's, Dance

Weird Offerings for Thursday

Hordes of Chinese hackers give the US major concerns
They do it for Nationalistic pride but with success comes substantial goverment rumuneration.

Sin Chew Daily and China Press reported that a sexretary accidentally bit off the penis of her employer while giving him oral sex in a car when the car was struck by another vehicle.

Celebrity priest, The Rev. Alberto Cutié is in hot Water after magazine pics from TVnotas showed him cavorting on the beach with a woman. In one pic she has her legs wrapped around him, it is reported

Vincent Van Gogh arrested in Florida on crack cocaine charge
That would be the "other" Vincent Van Gogh

Giant tarantulas have invaded Bowen Australia, a coastal town about 700 miles northwest of Brisbane

Dead gamer tried to write the name of his murderer in his own blood on PC

Cat parasite has huge impact on mankind as half of the planet's population is affected

Posted By: hickory_johnson | Date: Thu May 07, 2009 | Comments (2)

May 6, 2009

Your Daily Jury Duty for the Midwest Divison

Two High School Seniors from Greensburg, Indiana arrested for "fooling around" in the locker room. One looks happy to be there, one not so happy. Let this be a lesson to y'all, don't go “running around naked” when everyone else is wearing a "T-shirt, gym shorts and underwear." Mugshots and story.
Posted By: qualityleashdog | Date: Wed May 06, 2009 | Comments (3)
Category: School, Public Indecency, Your Daily Loser

Midwest Crime Round Up

Out of Work Teachers Sell Meth; South Bend, Ind: Twin sisters and out of work school teachers, Maria and Michelle Stancati, have plead guilty to dealing methamphetamine within 1,000 feet of a school. Indy Star

Ex-Public Defender Busted in Child Sex Internet Sting;
Marion County, Ind: Ryan W. Snyder, former Marion County Public Defender, was caught in an internet sex sting in February 2008. He has been sentenced to two years in prison. Indy Star

Three Arrested in BB Gun Home Invasion;
Wauwatosa, Wisc: Three high school students were arrested in a home invasion after demanding $1,200 at gunpoint. The suspect with the weapon brandished what looked like a handgun, but was really a BB gun. Milwaukee Journal Sentinel

Teen Declines Sex for Money, Utilities Shut Off;
Chicago, Ill: A West Side teen was solicited for sex for money by her landlord. When she turned him down, he shut off the gas and electric. He now faces charges for interfering with a public utility. Chicago Breaking News

Driver Painting Nails Kills Motorcyclist;
Lake Zurich, Ill: According the News Sun Sun Times News Group, Laura Hunt of Morris IL, “told police that she was painting her fingernails and did not notice the light was red.” According to one Officer her vehicle knocked the victim "a couple hundred feet." Sun Times News Group

Posted By: chris_cantwell | Date: Wed May 06, 2009 | Comments (2)
Category: Addictions, Crime, Death, Drugs, Law, Weapons

Pierced Glasses

If I were to ever get a piercing I would definitely consider getting this done. A piercing that actually has a function. Apparently, each lens is attached to a piercing in the bridge on the nose by magnets and I hope those magnets are strong enough, so you don't accidentally knock them off all the time.
Posted By: mdb777 | Date: Wed May 06, 2009 | Comments (7)
Category: Body, Body Modifications

Lobster Vasectomy

If you are going to shoplift lobster, hiding them in your pants is not such a good idea. A 24 year old Bristol, England man found this out first hand. He grabbed two lobsters from their tank, put them down his drawers and ran out the supermarket door. At which point the lobsters grabbed him and EMTs had to use pliers to get them loose from his family jewels. After a hospital stay he's healing and will get use of his favorite body part back. But alas, will now be permenetly shooting blanks. Sad for him but good news for the gene pool!
Posted By: patty | Date: Wed May 06, 2009 | Comments (5)

What Were They Thinking? #1

Hi there! I'm Salamander Sam, and you may remember me from such comment sections as Follies of the Mad Men #33 and Follies of the Mad Men #31. As you may know from my comments, I like vintage technology, and so you can imagine my excitement when I found out that Google Books obtained the rights to every issue of Popular Science ever made. The good news for you is that you don't need to waste countless hours searching through the archives for hilarious articles, because I was already doing that anyways! This will be the first entry in my "What Were They Thinking" series, which will probably be the first of many series devoted to the weirdness that once was. And, like the Top Ten List, I will start out with the best example:

One of Popular Science's longest running segment was called "I'd Like To See Them Make...", in which readers suggested ideas for new products. Many were quite brilliant, but there were some which can only be enjoyed with the benefit of hindsight...

(from the January 1956 issue of Popular Science)

Special Bonus Product:

(from the April 1953 issue of Popular Science)
Posted By: Salamander Sam | Date: Wed May 06, 2009 | Comments (7)
Category: Products, 1950's, Goofs and Screw-ups, Yesterday's Tomorrows
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All original content in posts is Copyright © 2008 by the author of the post, either Alex Boese ("Alex"), Paul Di Filippo ("Paul"), or Chuck Shepherd ("Chuck"). All rights reserved. The banner illustration at the top of this page is Copyright © 2008 by Rick Altergott.