Weird Universe

February 24, 2009

Autour du Mondegreens

Mondegreens is the term for mishearings of song lyrics. For instance, many people mishear the Creedence Clearwater Revival song "Bad Moon on the Rise" as "Bathroom on the right".

The Language Log notes that a new spin on this old phenomenon is for people to find foreign language videos and then to interpret the lyrics as if the people were speaking in English. The linguists are calling this "Autour-du-mondegreens" ("autour du monde" means "around the world" in french).

One of the classics of this new genre is a Dutch children's video, which is construed in English as having the recurring lyric "Fart in the Duck" (Warning: the captions are NSFW):

And here's an example in which lyrics are transliterated from English into Bulgarian gibberish:

(via Segal Books)
Posted By: Alex | Date: Tue Feb 24, 2009 | Comments (6)
Category: Music

February 23, 2009

Machine to Cure Headaches

Image from Text from the Salt Lake Tribune, Dec 10, 1939:

A Machine to Cure Headaches
Sufferers from chronic headaches may be interested in the contrivance pictured herewith. The inventor calls it a mechanical chiropractor and he says that through its use it is possible to find relief from headaches, poor circulation and indigestion.
The machine is somewhat complicated but it is said to put a patient through a course of exercises as vigorous as those employed by a skilled chiropractor. It is said to also correct curvature of the spine, weakness and many other ailments in the treatment of which the average chiropractor specializes.
Posted By: Alex | Date: Mon Feb 23, 2009 | Comments (13)
Category: Inventions, Medicine

Unchained Melody x 7

One of these seven versions of UNCHAINED MELODY does not belong with the others. Using your best Sesame Street training, try to guess which one, and register your vote in the comments!

Unchained Melody - Zamfir
Posted By: Paul | Date: Mon Feb 23, 2009 | Comments (8)
Category: Music, 1950's

Meat Joy

So far as I can tell, this famed bit of performance art is an exact depiction of what most of the WU commenters are always seeking to arrange amongst themselves.

Carolee Schneeman - "Meat joy"
by arginati22
Posted By: Paul | Date: Mon Feb 23, 2009 | Comments (14)
Category: Food, Performance Art, 1960's

Owwwwwww!  (Repeat as Necessary)

News of the Weird Daily
Monday, February 23, 2009

Oklahomans need more protection than you
The legislature is on the verge of banning eyeball tattoos (which sound hoaxy, anyway, but apparently are real) because senators worry about the danger even "if . . . one person" does it. So far, the other 49 states don't believe any of their people are dumb enough to let someone prick their scleras. London's The Sun has the photo of someone getting one, from a year ago. KSBI-TV (Oklahoma City) /// The Sun
Comments 'eyeball_tattoos'

More Things to Worry About

Cliché Come to Life: Charming New York art dealer Mark Zaplin said it's not his fault if those nuns he bought the $2.2M painting from for $450,000 don't have any business sense. [Ed.: Wait, what's the cliché here? Oh, yeah, I forgot: Zaplin's doomed, according to two dozen or so horror movies.] New York Post

Life Is Too Long: (1) John Allwood, 29, broke his own world record by smashing 47 watermelons over his head at the Chinchilla Melon Festival in Australia. (2) So far, 18,000 have signed up to watch, over the 'net, the first-ever live birth of an elephant. Australian Broadcasting Corp. News /// Agence France-Presse via Yahoo

Undignified Death: A 28-yr-old man was run over on Miami's Palmetto Expressway in the middle of the night after he fell off an over-the-highway sign he was tagging. (Upstate, in Fort Walton Beach, a 25-yr-old man didn't quite cross over . . yet, anyway . . in his try, but he did get arrested for trespass because apparently he had to use his neighbor's garage to gas himself.) WPLG-TV (Miami) /// Northwest Florida Daily News

Recurring Themes: (1) A high official at OSHA ($150k/yr) has been on paid leave for nearly 19 months with utterly no work to do after a spit-spat with his boss. (2) An Arkansas insurance company is the latest to deny an employee's worker compensation claim because the employee, on the job but in violation of the rules, was badly injured when he went to help a female customer who was getting beaten up. Washington Post /// KLRT-TV (Little Rock)

Comments on Things to Worry About?
Comments 'worry_090223'

Your Daily Loser
Bad enough that David Kocmit, 27, falsely told police that he had been beaten up by three black men in the parking lot of a strip club in Cleveland. Worse that there was surveillance video proving that there was no attack and that Kocmit had just stumbled and fallen on his face. Worse yet that when confronted with the video, Kocmit still wouldn't give his story up. Plain Dealer
Comments 'david_kocmit'

People Whose Sex Lives Are Worse Than Yours
Public wankers: Danny Lovvern, 34, Belleville, Ill., accused of standing outside his house "every" morning and saluting the little kids walking by to school. And then there's Aussie Kevin Loomes, 58, who (yikes!) used to be media director for Queensland gov't's emergency services. Belleville News-Democrat /// Australian Associated Press via Herald Sun (Melbourne)

And this guy's is way-worse than yours: He reported to the ER at Huntsville (Ala.) Hospital last Wednesday with a crochet needle in his urethra. AWI, but still . . .. News Courier (Athens, Ala.)
Comments 'lovvern_loomes'

Today's Newsrangers: Tom Norris, Jerry Whittle, Sandy Pearlman, Stephen Taylor, Don Schullian

Posted By: Chuck | Date: Mon Feb 23, 2009 | Comments (0)

February 22, 2009

The Sleeping Bear

Artist Eiko Ishizawa has designed a bear sleeping bag, which seems very practical, unless a bear happens upon you and decides it wants to mate with this beautiful stranger.

Posted By: Alex | Date: Sun Feb 22, 2009 | Comments (16)
Category: Animals, Products

Diana Dors

Here's one of the weirdest things about life. There's this thing called "time" that can turn beautiful young creatures into bloated parodies of themselves.

Take the case of Diana Dors....

Posted By: Paul | Date: Sun Feb 22, 2009 | Comments (13)
Category: Celebrities, Movies, Sex Symbols, 1950's, Breasts

February 21, 2009

Weekend in Havana

Can you sing as fast as Carmen Miranda does in this tune, "Rebola a Bola," from WEEKEND IN HAVANA?

I found the Portuguese lyrics and had Google translate them. The eccentric result is to be found after the jump: original line in Portuguese followed by English "translation."

More in extended >>
Posted By: Paul | Date: Sat Feb 21, 2009 | Comments (7)
Category: Fashion, Human Marvels, Movies, Music, 1940's, South America

February 20, 2009

Bad Luck Blackie

We all know that cartoon genius Tex Avery was an utter madman in his animation. But BAD LUCK BLACKIE strikes me as the most bizzare and surreal example of his art that I've ever seen.

Posted By: Paul | Date: Fri Feb 20, 2009 | Comments (17)
Category: Pop Art, Surrealism, Cartoons, Cats, Dogs, 1940's

Jonathan Lee Riches Files Again, Plus Hoax Alert

News of the Weird Daily
Friday, February 20, 2009

Things to Worry About

The Worcester's buttonquail was supposed to be extinct, but a recent photo turned up of a live one in the Philippines, so it wasn't extinct (but now it is because that one was cluelessly sold for food at a poultry market). National Geographic

Update: Crazy ol' Jonathan Lee Riches, the federal inmate who is positively the looniest serial litigator in all of America's hoosegows, just filed again, claiming that many of his problems (which are legion) stem from his addiction to NASCAR (which is NASCAR's fault). Nashville City Paper /// Riches's Wikipedia entry

A gay Heathrow airport security guard won £62.5k ($89k) because his female boss constantly dissed his sexuality, why, once even shaking her breasts at him! Daily Mail

Least Competent Police: In Ireland, cops were quite alarmed about a scofflaw Polish motorist with about 50 accumulated tickets, until they realized that it was really several Polish motorists who were ticketed, and the reason the same name was reported is that Irish cops were copying "Prawo Jazdy" off the Polish license, thinking t was the guy's name, but it was just "driver's license" in Polish. Reuters via Yahoo

Hoax Alert: The reporter for that fabulous story in this space on Wednesday (about the Chinese guy with a wife and five gals on the side) got fired yesterday for plagiarism, having lifted the story from a magazine, and his editor is investigating whether it's a true plagiarized story or a made-up plagiarized story. People's Daily (Beijing)

Irony from a certain age: Years ago, Maytag appliances were advertised as extremely low-maintenance (The Maytag repairman was "the loneliest man in town"), so now comes Maytag repairman Darin French of Incline Village, Nev., convicted yesterday of a scheme of overbilling the company for warranty work on that low-maintenance stuff. Associated Press via Yahoo

Comments on Things to Worry About?
Comments 'worry_090220'

Your Daily Jury Duty
["In America, a person is presumed innocent until the mug shot is released"]
Raymond Marston, Tampa, who . . ah, screw it . . guilty . . too easy. All right, Ryan Hayes, 49, Golden, Colo., who may have shot his dog or may simply be the owner of a dog that jumped on the pistol and shot himself . . well . . between the eyes? Mmmm, OK, he's guilty, too. How about Sandra Stephens-Foster, 60, who may have been driving shit-faced, chased by cops for an hour, but then getting caught when she stopped to drop off her car with a valet at the Dallas-Fort Worth airport? Naaa, she's goin' down, too. The hell with it. See ya Monday. St. Petersburg Times /// KMGH-TV (Denver) /// Fort Worth Star-Telegram /// Dallas Morning News [Stephens-Foster backstory, if you're interested]]
Comments 'marstonhayes_stephensfoster'

Today's Newsrangers: Jeff Powell, Emory Kimbrough, Stephen Taylor, Ted Kowalczyk, Dan Asimov, Stuart Worthington, Sue Clark, Bruce Townley

Posted By: Chuck | Date: Fri Feb 20, 2009 | Comments (0)
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All original content in posts is Copyright © 2008 by the author of the post, either Alex Boese ("Alex"), Paul Di Filippo ("Paul"), or Chuck Shepherd ("Chuck"). All rights reserved. The banner illustration at the top of this page is Copyright © 2008 by Rick Altergott.