Weird Universe Archive

June 2009

June 29, 2009

Diggi-Loo, Diggi-Ley

Time to make fun of the Eurovision Song Contest again. Here's the winning entry from 1984.

Posted By: Paul - Mon Jun 29, 2009 - Comments (5)
Category: Contests, Races and Other Competitions, Music, 1980s, Europe

How to Be a Better Thetan, a Better Getaway Driver, a Better Lecturer on Quantum Physics

News of the Weird / Pro Edition
June 29, 2009 (news from June 20-27)

Inside Scientology
The St. Petersburg Times last week advanced our "religious" knowledge (Scientology being a religion in the same sense that "Steeler Nation" is a religion, except that Steelers' season tickets are much less expensive) by quoting extensively four formerly-high-ranking dropouts (who were of course immediately downgraded by the Church from "clear" to "liar!"). (It's the principle by which J. Edgar Hoover maintained power for so long: Compile dossiers on any friends who could do ya harm, 'cause one day they won't be your friends.) Yr Editor's favorite revelations: (1) Senior executives' aggressiveness was challenged by the supreme leader, android David Miscavige, who staged games of musical chairs down to the last man standing, to the tune of Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody ("Is this the real life? / Is this just fantasy? / Caught in a landslide / No escape from reality"). (2) It was normal procedure, that when L. Ron Hubbard himself (or now, the android) was displeased, he would take the displeasers out to sea on the church's boat, Apollo, and force them off a gangplank, while reciting "We commit your sins and errors to the deep and trust you will rise a better thetan" (only now it can be done in a swimming pool, but everyone's still fully clothed). Yr Editor forgets: Was The Church of the Subgenius a perfect parody of Scientology, or was it the other way around? St. Petersburg Times [part 3 of 3-part series; the other two are good, too] /// Church of the Subgenius

Securities Reform, One Adviser at a Time
Two formerly well-to-do German couples, whose retirement savings were all put into F State sub-prime mortgages [ed.: ROTFL!] and who thus lost nearly everything, kidnaped their investment adviser, James Amburn, and actually tortured his ass for several days at the vacation home of one of the couples. This was not that pansy-ish waterboarding torture but major, Syriana-type torture, and he was rescued only when he coded out a hostage message, and 40 cops found and freed him. The Times (London)

Can't Possibly Be True
Sharon McShurley, the mayor of Muncie, Ind., has finally, in June of 2009, put an end to her fire department's long-time protocol of delivering memos and documents from fire stations to the chief downtown by driving them there in fire trucks. Mayor McShurley identified this practice as "not an efficient operation" and ordered the department to start using e-mail. Star Press (Muncie)


More in extended >>

Posted By: Chuck - Mon Jun 29, 2009 - Comments (3)
Category:

June 28, 2009

Billy Mays

This has been the weirdest month with (in)famous people dying. First, David Carradine was found dead hanging naked in a hotel closet in Thailand, then Ed McMahon dies of pneumonia, both Farah Fawcett and Michael Jackson die on the same day and now Billy Mays has sold his last tub of Oxiclean. May they all rest in peace.


Posted By: mdb777 - Sun Jun 28, 2009 - Comments (17)
Category: Celebrities, Death, Video

MP3 Experiment

Back on May 23, Over 2,000 people gathered for the Sixth Annual Mp3 Experiment. Everyone had to download the same mp3 and at exactly 4:00 pm press play. Once the opening song finished, Steve (the voice on the mp3) tells you to do some crazy stuff. Too bad I don't live in New York, because this looks like a lot of fun.
Improv Everywhere


Posted By: mdb777 - Sun Jun 28, 2009 - Comments (5)
Category: Entertainment, Games, Recreation, Video

Pabst Blue Ribbon Dog

Come one come all and see the World's Ugliest Dog! Pabst, the underdog with an underbite, beat out the previous winner. Miss Ellie, a Chinese Crested Hairless, still took the pedegree catagory. As winner Pabst takes home $1600 and a modeling contract with the House of Dog. Congrats Pabst! Check out his striking visage here- http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090628/ap_on_fe_st/us_odd_world_s_ugliest_dog

Posted By: patty - Sun Jun 28, 2009 - Comments (4)
Category:

The Ritz Brothers

This novelty song and alleged "comedy" act is guaranteed to stink up your day, it's so incredibly bad.

Posted By: Paul - Sun Jun 28, 2009 - Comments (5)
Category: Movies, Music, Cats, 1930s

SelectaVision

Once upon a time, before laser-read discs, there was SelectaVision: movie discs that were interpreted by a mechanical stylus, just like vinyl records.

Read about the technology here.

And there are plenty of players and discs for sale cheap on eBay, if you want to go retro!

The first four minutes of the video below show lots of period films offered in the medium. Starting at the four-minute mark, you see the player and how it works.

Posted By: Paul - Sun Jun 28, 2009 - Comments (3)
Category: Movies, Technology, Television, Yesterday’s Tomorrows

Spinning Skyscraper opens next year

Get your reservation now!! A spinning skyscraper being built in Italy will be shipped and assembled in Dubai.

The skyscraper slowly revolves and can be set to move different ways. Here's the video with "dramatic" background music.



Here's the web link so you can save your spot on the top floor:

http://www.dynamicarchitecture.net/home.html

image

I'm getting motion-sickness just watching the video -- what will happen in the city? (I pity the drunks.)

Posted By: gdanea - Sun Jun 28, 2009 - Comments (6)
Category: Buildings and Other Structures

June 27, 2009

Black Zeus’s Medical Oddities

You ever wander what a man would look like if he let his ear hair grow out?

Or how about the unborn fetus of a twin?

Maybe you just want to know if there is truth to the phrase "swallow a watermelon seed and it will grow in your stomach."

FAIR WARNING. This just may mess your world up.

Click here for slideshow.

Posted By: Paul - Sat Jun 27, 2009 - Comments (7)
Category: Body, Medicine, Reader Recommendation

Make Mine Duff’s!

image
Who knew that Homer Simpson's favorite brewery also made cake mixes?

Posted By: Paul - Sat Jun 27, 2009 - Comments (4)
Category: Business, Advertising, Products, Food, Cartoons, Alcohol

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Alex Boese
Alex is the creator and curator of the Museum of Hoaxes. He's also the author of various weird, non-fiction books such as Elephants on Acid.

Paul Di Filippo
Paul has been paid to put weird ideas into fictional form for over thirty years, in his career as a noted science fiction writer. He has recently begun blogging on many curious topics with three fellow writers at The Inferior 4+1.

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Chuck is the purveyor of News of the Weird, the syndicated column which for decades has set the gold-standard for reporting on oddities and the bizarre.

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