Death Wish

Police in North Vernon, Indiana say it is obvious this man had a death wish. That may not be so uncommon for men his age and perhaps in his profession, but he accomplished it in a very disturbing fashion. I've followed the events in The North Vernon Plain Dealer & Sun, but I do find it somewhat unnerving that the story is making the rounds through many newspapers in central and southern Indiana, as I fear widespread dissemination of the story may open the door to copycats.
UPDATE: Meth, unsuprisingly, played a role. Greensburg Daily News

Unrelated bonus mugshot from the same paper of Nikkiah C. Weddle, a loving mother, that just appears slothful. I feel that her having smoked marijuana three weeks earlier will play a heavy role in her defense, since we've all smoked a joint that we took almost a full month to recover from.

It Was Hidden In What!?

Talk about dedication to your job. Arizona Department of Public Safety spokesman Bart Graves summed it up pretty well, in fact, when he said "Yeah, that really does suck." He's referring to the recent drug bust the Arizona police made when they discovered more than seven hundred pounds of marijuana stuffed into the septic tank on a truck hauling human waste. Leonard Salcido of Tucson was arrested and charged with possession and transportation of marijuana. Read the article and see the pictures on CNN.

Clowning Around

In the body of Florida's laws, there are bound to be quite a few that defy explanation. For example, Florida statute 876.13 which states: No person or persons shall in this state, while wearing any mask, hood, or device whereby any portion of the face is so hidden, concealed, or covered as to conceal the identity of the wearer, enter upon, or be, or appear upon or within the public property of any municipality or county of the state. That said, we can now understand what the cop was thinking when he arrested 18 year old Matthew David Lopez on Tuesday. Because Mr. Lopez was walking down a public street wearing a clown mask and orange wig. You can read about his arrest here. The reader comments range from jokes about the stupidity of the police for turning this into an arrest in the first place, to those who defend the cop's actions, and those who insist that if the police want to arrest anyone for this, it ought to be aimed at Muslim women who wear the niqab (face veil).

Instant Karma

Jesse Gonzalez, 24, of Bridgeport Connecticut, was struck by a car and a bus while fleeing the scene of a fatal shooting Monday evening. Apparently Jesse and his father, Joaquin Gonzalez, had a history of domestic violence and officers had been called to their home before to settle disputes. But the argument on February 22 ended badly. Jesse is accused of shooting his father in the head, killing him. The article includes photos and a video.

Gay News Today

Was Jesus Gay? Elton John seems to think so. He stated as much in a recent Parade magazine interview. Of course the mere idea struck terror into the hearts of all homophobic Christians and those who choose to interpret the bible as saying "discriminate openly" rather than "love thy fellow man".

And what about those silly gay people who want to serve in the military? Surprisingly, a recent CBS News poll asking about Obama's wish to repeal the Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy, finds that a majority of the public support allowing openly gay men and women to serve. But what's even more surprising is that the same poll doesn't want homosexuals to serve. I suppose the poll was worded badly. Or maybe the people who answered that poll still think gay means 'having or showing a merry, lively mood'. In that case, who wouldn't want a bunch of merry old souls in the military?

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A Little Light Weirdness – 8

A would be bank-robber in Austria was foiled in his robbery attempt when the bank closed early for a staff training session. The man came equipped with a Barack Obama mask and gun but was stopped at the first hurdle when the locked door refused to open for him. Staff inside initially thought it was part of the training or a joke, and their laughter aggravated the criminal until he eventually fled empty-handed (Digital Spy).

More successful were the thieves that managed to steal several US landmarks, including the Palace of Fine Arts, USS Pampanito and Ghirardelli Square. Models of course, part of an exhibition of Mark and Jannet Benz’s Lego creations on display at the Palo Alto Museum of American Heritage, and worth several thousand dollars. A reward of $500 has been offered by the Benzes (SF Weekly).

But if Jan and Mark are thinking of upping their home security, they should perhaps avoid following the example of Alexander Skopintsew of Primorye in Russia, who decided to deter intruders by planting homemade landmines around his garden. He was inevitably found out when a trespasser was injured when setting off one of these devices, and charged with possession of illegal weapons, receiving a suspended sentence (ABC News).

Of course another alternative might be to have nothing worth stealing. Perhaps something similar occurred to retired lorry driver Ken Strickland, who amassed a collection of over 3000 watering cans, each meticulously documented. Sadly Mr. Strickland died last month aged 78, bequeathing the entire assortment to his niece, who is at a loss as to what to do with them and may in fact sell them on behalf of a charity. One watering can however will not be up for sale, it contains her uncle's ashes (Metro).

Meanwhile hundreds of other women up and down the UK might be feeling a little let down this Monday, after British department store Debenhams recorded a 76% surge in sales of their range of “anatomy boosting” underwear for men ahead of Valentine’s day. Turn around is fair play, I say (Reuters).

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A Little Light Weirdness – 7

It’s an election year in the UK, and politicians there are suddenly more image conscious than ever. None more so than incumbent Prime Minister Gordon Brown, who - at his wife’s suggestion - has swapped his regular Kit-Kat munching habit for a diet of bananas in an effort to slim down a bit. While it’s nice to know that the British PM’s wife is perhaps a reader this blog, she’s obviously not a regular one, or she’d have known that portly politicos are more trusted. Now if only he’d show the common touch by going on a bacon binge (Orange News).

Mind you, Mr. Brown is not the only statesman trying to avert a bleak future this week, an unnamed Arab ambassador got the shock of his life when he finally lifted his new bride’s niqab, only to find she had cross-eyes and a beard. The groom immediately went to court to have the marriage annulled, claiming he had been tricked into the marriage and that the bride’s parents had used pictures of her attractive older sister to deceive him. The court found for the groom and dissolved the marriage, but turned down his demand for $150000 compensation (Daily Mail).

But perhaps he’s been a bit quick to judge by appearances. Two Chinese men certainly were when the found a hoard of 20 clay artefacts in an old tomb they discovered in a field near their home, only to later sell the whole lot to a collector for less than $2000. Unfortunately for the pair, theirs were rare finds from the Sui-Tang Dynasty, making the collection over 1000 years old. One item alone, a pottery figurine, recently reached $150,000 at auction (Daily Times).

More fortunate was Wendy Jones of Aberglasney in Wales, who took the old plate she’d had perched on her sideboard for years – except on those odd occasions it had fallen off it - to a TV antiques show, in a plastic carrier bag, only to be told it was part of a rare, Prussian royal service worth over £100000 (Telegraph).

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Gothic Kittens

Holly Crawford, 35, from Pennsylvania, is set to go on trial today for cruelty to animals because she was trying to sell Gothic Kittens online. It's not the act of selling the kittens that has Holly in trouble, however. It is the fact that the kittens were pierced (as pictured). When humane officers searched her home in December, they found three kittens with ear, neck and tail piercings. Holly's attorney has posed the question “Why is it a crime to pierce a cat’s ears?” and she claims that she had no cruel intentions. Reader comments on the article (which you can read here) range from "punish the freak" to "if you punish this woman you should also punish people who declaw cats". What's your opinion?

Follies of the Mad Men #78

Now that the coffee tastes better and hubby will drink it, wifey can add the poison this idiot so richly deserves.

Wanted:  Fernando Botero Model!

You might have been following this recent case of a stolen baby. I suggest the police interrogate famous Colombian artist Botero. Surely the suspect has previously modeled for Botero at some point.

All original content in posts is Copyright © 2008 by the author of the post, either Alex Boese ("Alex"), Paul Di Filippo ("Paul"), or Chuck Shepherd ("Chuck"). All rights reserved. The banner illustration at the top of this page is Copyright © 2008 by Rick Altergott.