Earlier this week, John Arwood and Amber Campbell phoned police to report they were trapped in a closet at Daytona State College's Marine and Environmental Science Center. They had been there for 2 days and needed to get out. When the police arrived, the scene they found wasn't pretty. Piles of feces in the closet and drug paraphenalia. They also found the closet wasn't locked. In fact, it couldn't lock. The couple could have gotten out if they had simply pushed the door open. The pair have now been charged with trespassing. [Orlando Sentinel]
A moron in Pennsylvania shot a gun into his neighbor's house while trying to clear the chamber. He stated in court that firing the gun was the only way he knew to unload it. Some people should not be allowed out on their own!
In Vienna, Austria someone set a bucket full of feces to explode when a line was tripped at a spot where police regularly park to watch for speeders. The police officer who tripped it was covered in poo from six and a half feet away. He wasn't injured except perhaps his dignity.
His sentences were as eccentric as his plots. Viz:
"I know how to get to the inside of a chilled-steel receptacle with no more noise than a cockroach, drunk after emerging from an uncorked gin-bottle in a garbage can, would make as he sneaked back to Mrs. C., waiting up to biff him on the beezer for leaving her to mind the youngsters while he went skyhooting. "