Your Daily Loser
In a move that would have fit right into the movie Dumb and Dumber, two young men were caught shoplifting... from a store full of more than sixty uniformed police officers. The annual 'Shop With A Cop' event in Portland marks the beginning of the school year as the officers take dozens of needy children to a local store to purchase school supplies. Store security notified the police that the two men were stuffing their backpacks with items. The men stated "we thought the police would be distracted." You can read more about it here.
While this happened years ago, I wanted to share it with those of you who need a good laugh today.
Jodee Berry, then aged 26 of Panama City, Florida, sued the Hooter's restaurant where she used to work because she was misled over a prize in a beer selling contest.
Things sure have changed since I was a kid and fast food worker (about ten years ago). Back then the fast food workers would've been high and hoping the customers didn't notice, but last Friday it was an Arby's employee calling to report a drive-thru customer indulging with his girlfriend and one-year-old in the car. The boyfriend is free on bond after charges of neglect of a dependent and possession of marijuana were filed against him. The Indy Star
And from Rensselaer, Indiana
comes a report of a 17 and 14-year-old who finally slaughtered a 150 pound, 6 foot long, alligator with a shotgun after their frog spears failed to do the trick. And no, they will not face criminal charges since alligators are not considered a game species in Indiana. The Indy Channel
Ronald Cousin, Steve Nelon and Jerome Thompson, of Las Vegas, Nevada, along with two underaged pals, decided to try a little breaking and entering. Unfortunately for them, they picked the wrong house. The Story.
Christopher Newton, former reporter for the Associated Press, was fired when it was discovered that he was making up all of his news sources. It only took the AP a few years to catch on... The Story.
Walter Nowakowski, from Canada, was caught driving the wrong way down a one way street. The police say he was distracted. Not such a big deal, you say? How about the fact that he was distracted because he had his pants around his ankles and he was watching child porn on his laptop as he drove. The Story.
If you live in Wrexham, you might want to stay off the roads. Michelle Hughes was arrested after she smashed her car into a parked vehicle and then drove head-on into another. But apparently her erratic driving was caused by her excessive drinking and not because she is legally blind. The Story.
Actually, these guys might be winners for getting away with it... Army and Navy personnel, from the officers down to the enlisted men, were issued travel cards (credit cards paid for by Uncle Sam), and they had a jolly good time using those cards to pay for their visits to brothels and strip clubs. The Story.
Your Historical Daily Loser
- Edward Blaine was having a bad day. How bad was it, you ask? When he tried to rob a bank in Port Royal, Virginia, he dropped half the money on the way out, then discovered he had locked his keys inside the getaway car. That's when the angry civilians caught up to him. He tried to flee but was run down and in the struggle he managed to shoot himself in the leg. The Story.
- The expression on Joseph Monahan's
face is priceless. He's been charged with disorderly conduct in a licensed establishment. Disorderly conduct is defined as acts that are of a nature to corrupt the public morals, or outrage the sense of public decency, etc. A licensed establishment is, for lack of a better word, a bar. Now correct me if I'm wrong, but, isn't a bar the perfect place to commit acts that could corrupt the public morals?
Your Daily Loser(s)
- I normally use this space to highlight the stupid actions of regular folks who are caught breaking the law in some way. Today, however, the honor of being a Daily Loser goes to a few police officers, in Baltimore, Maryland.
You see, Joshua Kelly and Llara Brook, of Chantilly, Virginia, went to watch the big game between the Orioles and Kansas City in Camden Yards. But they had never been to Camden Yards before, so... they got lost. Read the story
to find out how the police reacted when Joshua and Llara tried to ask for directions.
- There is a long history of people taking the law into their own hands in order to mete out justice. Jerome Ersland
of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, is now firmly established in that history. Ersland has been charged with first-degree murder for killing a teenager who tried to rob his Pharmacy. The Story.
Your Daily Loser(s)
- Look kids! A new game! Joshua N. Sizemore and Amanda L. Madison of Lakewood, Washington, wanted to play strip poker, but they didn't have any cards. At least, that's the only reason I can think of for what they did next... They decided to throw baseball-sized rocks onto cars from a bridge over the interstate. If the left headlight of a car broke, Amanda had to remove some clothing. If the right headlight was broken, it was Joshua's turn to get naked. The police were not amused. The Story.
- Typically this section is for posting the mug shot of an accused criminal and WUvians decide his or her guilt (or innocence) based on the image. So I'm warning you that this is not a typical mug shot
. Instead, it's the story
of a 'brave' soul who just wanted some cigarettes to go with his beer. (Be sure to watch the video! I, for one, can't stop laughing.)
Your Daily Loser
- Henry Gasiorowski, of Greenwich, Connecticut probably feels like the biggest turkey after a recent hunting accident. Mr. Gasiorowski was sitting behind a turkey decoy, making turkey calls when a companion shot him. The Story.
(Today's Daily Loser story brought to you by Bill_!)
- Did she think it was a crime to go to Disney World? Bonnie Sweeten
from Pennsylvania called 911 to report that she and her daughter had been abducted and were trapped in the trunk of a car. Two hours later, Bonnie (and daughter Julia) boarded a flight from Philadelphia to Orlando, Florida, under a false name. She was found and later taken into custody inside the popular theme park. The Story.
Your Daily Loser
- Romeo Montillano, of San Diego, California, wanted to be a cop more than anything. Well, almost. Apparently he wanted to be a burglar more. The Story.
- No good deed shall go unpunished! 81 year-old James Stacy
of Akron, Ohio, has been charged with criminal damaging after he took a pickaxe and a broom to a pothole in front of his driveway to clear debris. One of Mr. Stacy's neighbors summed up the situation pretty well when she said, "I think this whole thing is asinine." The Story.
Your Daily Loser
- Pauline Terry wrote a letter to the police denying that her Club Compass in Ramsgate, Kent was a haven for drug taking. Unfortunately she wrote that letter on a piece of paper that was coated with cocaine. The Story.
- Some morons will do anything for money. For instance, William Cunningham
was recently sentenced to 100 years in prison for poisoning his children's soup in order to extort money from the Campbell's Soup company. The Story.
I'm guessing he won't be getting a card on father's day. (This is also further proof that men with facial hair can't be trusted.)
All original content in posts is Copyright © 2008 by the author of the post, either Alex Boese ("Alex"), Paul Di Filippo ("Paul"), or Chuck Shepherd ("Chuck"). All rights reserved. The banner illustration at the top of this page is Copyright © 2008 by Rick Altergott.