Dead Weird

In what can only be described as going beyond the spirit of friendly competition, undertaker David Wood stole the keys from a business rival's hearse, when the vehicle was - how you say - "occupied". The funeral of Patricia Thorburn was immediately disrupted as the car she had requested to be carried in, a 1968 Rolls Royce Phantom, was too heavy to push. Finally the car's owner, funeral director Joel Kerr, resorted to tearing out the walnut dashboard and hot-wiring the engine (BBC News).

Also in the UK, life-long bike fan Stuart McIntyre got his last wish in April, when friends built him a special "side-car hearse" so that he could take his final journey in the manner he had taken so many previous ones (Craven Herald).

Apparently, bike hearses are all the rage right now. Jay Howard of "Hometown Hearse" in Battle Creek has also recently added one to his line-up (WZZM13).

In fact, hearses seem to be so popular nowadays some people can't wait for the inevitable to take a ride in one. Certainly Sammy Townsley of Perthshire in Scotland was in a bit of a hurry, having stolen the hearse in the early morning hours, Townsley lost control of the car at high speed minutes later and crashed it into a telegraph pole (Perthshire Advertiser).

Finally, if you're up that way, the Montreal "Musée de Château Dufresne" is hosting an exhibition on the subject of death, funerals and their accoutrements; surely the perfect family day out. Called Celebrating the Dead: A Living Heritage, the exhibition is there till the end of August (Château Dufresne).

Breaking the Ice

Back in 1917, Railroad workers in Alaska who were bored during a long winter, set up a betting pool in which the winner determined the date and time that the ice on the Tanana River would break. Since then the event has grown to become the Nenana Ice Classic which attracts thousands. This year's jackpot is $283,723.00. But the neatest part is how they mark when the ice has broken. A wooden tripod is set up on the ice and wired to a clock in a tower along the shore. The winning time is determined when the ice moves enough to tighten the wire and trip the clock.

Midwest Division’s Friday Feast

Turtle Huntin’; Batesville, Ind.: Turtle Huntin’ offers you “the ultimate outdoor adventure,” through guided turtle hunting instruction and hunts. You can read all about turtle hunting at their website, but for a “minor charge” you too can turtle hunt like the pros. Turtle Huntin' Link fixed 2333 May, 9, 2009.

Garbage Clocks; Evanston, Ill: An Evanston man has been featured by CBS Sunday Morning and Thrillist for his clocks made out of garage sale junk. His clocks are available for purchase on Etsy. Thrillist

131 Years of Prayer; La Crosse, Wisc: At the Adoration Chapel of the Franciscan Sisters of Perpetual Adoration in La Crosse, Wisconsin; the Sisters have prayed at a consecrated host, the Holy Eucharist, for the past 131 years. Since 1878 the Sisters have prayed at the Holy Eucharist in shifts around the clock. Milwaukee Journal Sentinel

11 Year Old Steals Car; St. Cloud, Minn.: An 11 year old was arrested in St. Cloud Minnesota for stealing a car in Waite Park, Minnesota and driving it to the next town. Charges are pending. WCCO

Shoplifter Wrote Address On Job App; Dayton, Ohio: A man shoplifting at a clothing store filled out a job application with his real address before he left and set off the alarms. Chicago Tribune via the Associated Press.

Another BB Gun Robbery, Deadly; Chicago Ill: Ernesto Garcia decided to use a BB gun to rob a gas station. The weapon looked like a real handgun. So, one can assume that the police thought it was real when he refused to put it down. Garcia was shot eight times by the Chicago Police Officer. Garcia was a suspect in 25 other robberies. Chicago Tribune

Lightsabers on a Segway

So, I guess this is for the lazier Jedi.



Apparently, Star Wars fan videos never get old.

iSerenity

iSerenity offers "a relaxing web-based experience that delivers soothing sounds and images designed to reduce stress and calm nerves. Use iSerenity while at work or at home. You can even leave it running in the background while you work on your computer."

Nice idea, but their Library Lullaby sounds like it was recorded inside a parking structure. Pencil Parade would drive me insane in minutes; and why would anyone want to relax to Vacuum Vibrations?

Hot Thrills and Warm Chills

What you will witness in the video to the right is the first few minutes of HOT THRILLS AND WARM CHILLS. (It's totally Safe for Work, though the film itself is not.) But the trailer can only begin to convey the true stupefying awfulness of the film.

The gal doing the dance is actress Rita Alexander, and she's the ringleader of a trio of female jewel thieves. She meets with her cronies in her apartment, where they discuss their sex lives, with flashbacks of some assorted mattress workouts. The gals are topless during these bouts, but both males and females retain their underwear during the tussles. The love noises are dubbed in, over unmoving or unsynced lips. And the mambo soundtrack makes everything seem as if it's taking place at a bullfight or a Herb Alpert concert.

Anyhow, the girls--who live in Reno--are planning a heist-- During Mardi Gras! That's right, I bet you never knew Reno had an annual Mardi Gras, and a "French Quarter" as well. But they do in this universe, even though all the exterior shots are plainly shot in New Orleans. Reno seems to have been chosen as "Sin City" because New Orleans wasn't bawdy enough!

Having outlined the heist, the girls go out on the town, to a club that features an energetic but awkward topless dancer. One gal picks up a stranger, but our protagonist decides to go home with a local cop she knows!

In due course, the fabled heist is committed--off camera and past tense! One cop chases the fleeing Rita and a pal through the Mardi Gras parade and into one of New Orleans' famous above-ground, crypt-filled cemeteries. Rita eludes him by darting into a crypt, but gets locked in. She freaks out--despite having plenty of air and light and a gun in her hand with which to shoot off the lock--and commits suicide, and the closing credits roll.

You may now pick your jaws up off the ground.

TeacherTube

How could I have been ignorant prior to now of the glories of TeacherTube, which hosts such stimulating videos as this one?

The fun never stops!

Why Study Science?

Has science ever looked duller than in this video?