Mr Burger, a Melbourne-based chain of hamburger restaurants, recently offered to give "free burgers for life" to anyone who would legally change their last name to "Burger." They specified that this meant seven burgers a week, for as long as the person maintained the name Burger. However, anyone whose last name already was Burger, was disqualified from getting the award.
But then the restaurant heard from the Government Solicitor's office (the agency responsible for processing name-change applications), informing them that it would not process any applications for people changing their name to "Burger" for the purpose of winning burgers, because such applications "are not in the spirit of the name-change process." So the competition was canned.
At least, that's the story Mr Burger is telling everyone. Perhaps the restaurant actually got cold feet, realizing too many people might have taken them up on their offer.
As far as last names go, Burger really isn't that bad. I might have done it, except I'm not interested in eating burgers every day for the rest of my life.
At the George Stevens Academy in Blue Hill, Maine, a Twinkie has been kept on display for 40 years.
Back in 1976, chemistry teacher Roger Bennatti placed the Twinkie on top of the class blackboard in response to a student question about the legendary shelf-life of Twinkies. Eventually, the Twinkie was moved into a glass display box, but it remains at the school as a perpetual experiment on Twinkie immortality. More info: abc news.
When people find stuff in their food that doesn't belong there, it's usually things like cockroaches, small frogs, rat parts, etc. But when Dave Cook bit into his McDonald's cheeseburger, he found a folded-up $20 bill. He didn't complain to the restaurant about the unusual topping. Instead, he took a picture of the burger, finished it, and then called up the local TV news (WTVR in Virginia) to tell them about it.
I don't think a $20 bill is something that would get into a burger by accident. It had to be put there. The question is who put it there: Cook himself or one of the McDonald's employees?
The Square Donuts company of Terre Haute, Indiana has been making square donuts for 50 years, and they've trademarked the name. Eleven years ago, the Family Express convenience store also began making donuts that are square, and selling them as "square donuts." The Square Donuts company recently noticed what they were doing. Therefore, lawyers are now involved.
Square Donuts demands that Family Express stop selling those square donuts. Family Express insists that "square donuts" is too generic a concept to trademark.
I wonder if anyone has trademarked Triangular Donuts or Polyhedral Donuts? A business opportunity perhaps?
If Turducken is Gluttony 101 then Piecaken is the Masters Thesis. A pie inside a cake layered on another pie inside another cake. As many layers as you like with as many different combinations as you can think up. Decadent and delicious! Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
More proof that everything is upside-down in Australia, as good old Popsicles become Paddle Pops.
Also, as in our previous entry on Gaytime Raspberry Roughs, I could easily imagine someone getting more than they bargained for when they requested a "paddle pop," especially if you went into a sketchy corner grocery store and asked for the flavor known as "dragon popper" and got some amyl nitrate instead.
Alex is the creator and curator of the Museum of Hoaxes. He's also the author of various weird, non-fiction books such as Elephants on Acid.
Paul Di Filippo
Paul has been paid to put weird ideas into fictional form for over thirty years, in his career as a noted science fiction writer. He has recently begun blogging on many curious topics with three fellow writers at The Inferior 4+1.
Chuck is the purveyor of News of the Weird, the syndicated column which for decades has set the gold-standard for reporting on oddities and the bizarre.
Our banner was drawn by the legendary underground cartoonist Rick Altergott.