Category:
Baths, Showers and Other Cleansing Methods

Baths, and How to Take Them

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Entire small pamphlet here. Learn what you've been doing wrong.

Posted By: Paul - Sun Jun 02, 2013 - Comments (4)
Category: Body, Education, Hygiene, Baths, Showers and Other Cleansing Methods, Nineteenth Century

Horizontal Shower

Available from Dornbracht:

For the first time, HORIZONTAL SHOWER permits showering using the AMBIANCE TUNING TECHNIQUE while reclining. The application combines six WATER BARS recessed into a broad shower field above a reclining space, along with an eTOOL as the main operating element. Just as with VERTICAL SHOWER, with HORIZONTAL SHOWER the user can also choose from among a variety of pre-programmed choreographies, offering a range of settings for water temperature, intensity and quantity.

Just wondering how practical this would be for actually washing yourself, as opposed to lying down and getting a water massage. I'm also guessing most people wouldn't have enough water pressure in their house to install something like this. And, of course, there's no mention of price, because if you need to know how much it costs, you can't afford it.

Posted By: Alex - Thu May 30, 2013 - Comments (8)
Category: Bathrooms, Baths, Showers and Other Cleansing Methods

Tongue-Mounted Toothbrush

Adel Elseri and Said Fayad hope that the tongue-mounted toothbrush, which is their invention, will make them rich. You slip the device over your tongue and scrub away. Apparently it's one-time use only. Check out their facebook page for more info. [edmonton journal]

Posted By: Alex - Sun Mar 17, 2013 - Comments (5)
Category: Inventions, Baths, Showers and Other Cleansing Methods

The Fire Treatment

Would you set yourself on fire for beauty? According to The Inquisitr, the Fire Treatment (aka Huǒ liáo) is the hot new thing in China:

The process involves an esthetician or spa employee draping target areas of the face and body with alcohol and secret elixir saturated towels. The person, more specifically the towel the person is wearing, is set ablaze. Moments later the towel is extinguished. The fiery beauty regime is supposedly based off ancient Chinese medicine. The dangerous treatment is intended to eliminate dull skin, aid in the common cold, and revert obesity.





Posted By: Alex - Fri Mar 08, 2013 - Comments (12)
Category: Beauty, Ugliness and Other Aesthetic Issues, Baths, Showers and Other Cleansing Methods

Soap-Pooping Pigeons

GeoBeatsNews reports on an experimental London-based project to feed pigeons a special diet that'll make them poop soap. That way, instead of dirtying the city as they fly around, they'll clean it.


The video makes it sound like this is an official government-sponsored project. But as far as I can tell, it's an art project called "Pigeon D'Or" by Cohen Van Balen. That is, it's probably not really happening. Van Balen offers this description of the project:

With the help of biochemist James Chappell, we have used synthetic biology to design and create a bacteria that can modify the metabolism of pigeons. To achieve this, we have created a new biobrick, or standard biological part, that when added to the genetic information of the bacteria, creates lipase. We have also used a biobrick that lowers the ph. The result is a biological device that produces a kind of window-soap. We have built this device in the bacteria Lactobacillus, which is a bacteria that naturally occurs in the digestive tract. So when feeding this bacteria to a pigeon, it should produce and defecate biological soap.

Posted By: Alex - Tue Jan 22, 2013 - Comments (4)
Category: Animals, Art, Baths, Showers and Other Cleansing Methods, Excrement

Marvel Whirling Spray



Marvel Whirling Spray was a feminine hygiene product marketed in the early 20th century. It stopped being made and fell into obscurity for 100 years until the early 21st century, when it earned a place in comic-book history.

Alan Moore included a reprint of one of the Marvel Whirling Spray ads in an issue of The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (Vol. 1, #5). An executive at DC (publishers of the comic) saw the ad and became worried that their rival, Marvel Comics, would take offense — even though Marvel Whirling Spray was a real product that existed before Marvel Comics. So he ordered the entire print run destroyed. The few copies that survived are now considered rare collector's items. More details at recalledcomics.com.

Posted By: Alex - Sat Jan 19, 2013 - Comments (4)
Category: Hygiene, Baths, Showers and Other Cleansing Methods, Products, 1900s

Wolverine Soap

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Even before a certain blade-wielding comicbook character pre-empted the name of "Wolverine," could it possibly have been a good idea to name your product after a vicious, pint-sized killer beast?

"Wolverine Soap--it will rip the dirt off your skin, and your skin with it!"

No wonder the pitchman in the ad below is working so hard to find sales reps.


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Posted By: Paul - Fri Sep 21, 2012 - Comments (5)
Category: Animals, Business, Advertising, Products, Death, Destruction, Hygiene, Baths, Showers and Other Cleansing Methods, 1920s

Brush your teeth with soap?

Having your mouth washed out with soap is traditionally thought of as a punishment, but Dr. Gerald Judd doesn't think so. He's leading a campaign to convince everyone to stop using toothpaste, and brush their teeth with soap instead. He writes:

Teeth are best cleaned by brushing with any bar (not liquid) soap. Bar soap does an excellent job in cleaning tooth surfaces, enabling the enamel to thicken and causing the teeth to become less sensitive.
Toothpastes containing glycerine—which most do—are very sticky, requiring over 20 rinses to remove it from tooth surfaces. Glycerine-containing toothpastes leave a residual film, preventing the teeth from proper re-enamelization. Soap, on the other hand, is removed with two rinses.

Maybe he's onto something. I have no idea. But for now I think I'll stick with toothpaste.

Posted By: Alex - Thu Sep 13, 2012 - Comments (9)
Category: Hygiene, Baths, Showers and Other Cleansing Methods

Uncle Sam Toiletries





I suppose if the USA could fall for hokum like Crocodile Dundee, then Aussies could fall for this line of "American" products.

Posted By: Paul - Fri Aug 10, 2012 - Comments (4)
Category: Business, Advertising, Products, Stereotypes and Cliches, Baths, Showers and Other Cleansing Methods, Hair Styling, 1970s, Australia

Whiz Soap



Perhaps you recall the commercials with Madge the Manicurist, where she recommended Palmolive soap for its skin-softening qualities.

Well, Madge had nothing on a campaign from early in the century, for Whiz Soap, which informed customers that they could use Whiz to clean, oh, filthy farm equipment, and then use the same stuff for their personal bathing.

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[Click to enlarge for readability]

There seem to be lots of antique Whiz containers around for sale, if you want to commemorate this product in your home.

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Original ad here.

Posted By: Paul - Sun Jul 01, 2012 - Comments (4)
Category: Body, Business, Advertising, Products, Baths, Showers and Other Cleansing Methods, 1910s

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Alex Boese
Alex is the creator and curator of the Museum of Hoaxes. He's also the author of various weird, non-fiction, science-themed books such as Elephants on Acid and Psychedelic Apes.

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Paul has been paid to put weird ideas into fictional form for over thirty years, in his career as a noted science fiction writer. He has recently begun blogging on many curious topics with three fellow writers at The Inferior 4+1.

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