A scriptural approach to a trim and attractive body… working with the Lord, you’ll harness the POWER of your body’s own computer system to make you eat the kinds of foods you should and in the right amounts.
Much of early Christian theological debate is taken up with the issue of how Jesus is both a god and a human being. Early on there were some early Christians who thought that Jesus only “seemed” to have a human body but in reality was a god. You can see why Christians who held this position thought Jesus never went to the bathroom. This position, which is known as Doceticism, would come to be rejected as heresy, but those who wanted to argue that Jesus was truly human have to explain how the combination of humanity and divinity works. While they are doing that they are also trying to avoid the idea that the divinity in Jesus is somehow defiled by or corrupted by all the disgusting aspects of human bodies. Excrement, in particular, was just the kind of disgusting thing that people wanted to avoid.
There's also a book, published in 2018, with that title (amazon link). I have no idea of its quality (never having read it), but sometimes a title alone can be worth the price of purchase. For instance, the book sounds perfect to include among the reading material in a guest bathroom.
Donald Drusky, of McKeesport, Pa. (which happens to be my mother’s hometown) specifically wanted God “to grant him the guitar-playing skills of famous guitarists, along with resurrecting his mother and his pet pigeon.”
Suing God, and perhaps even winning, would seem to be the easy part. Collecting payment is what’s hard.
In Perth, Australia water mysteriously began flowing out of a gum tree on Easter weekend. Many suggested it must be some kind of divine message. Investigation by city workers uncovered a more mundane explanation: a broken water pipe underground.
The strange case of Daniel Waswa, a member of the Dini ya msambwa sect, who imagined that God had ordered him to die on the cross “for the sins of all Kenyans.” So he had his wife nail him to a cross, which she did. She then promptly dropped dead (of shock?). As for him:
Waswa hung on his cross for several days, rejecting appeals from Christian friends to be taken down. Villagers gathered around to offer their prayers. He was eventually taken down from the cross, dying from the nail wounds, which had become infected. He refused all medical help and died on a Sunday, exactly two weeks after his crucifixion.
I'd never heard of the Dini ya msambwa sect before, but some googling reveals that the name is better translated as "Religion of the Ancestral Customs" (not Creed of the Cross). It was founded by Elijah Masinde. The stories about Waswa make it sound like a radical Christian cult, but Wikipedia defines it as "an African traditional religion that has been labeled an anti-colonial religion."
The most distinctive practice of the Aetherius Society is its use of Spiritual Energy Batteries. The prayers and chanting of members are focused through trained leaders, and poured into a battery where they can be stored indefinitely. In times of crisis, such as war, earthquake or famine, thousands of hours of stored prayer energy can be released in one moment.
Created around 20 years ago in Syosset, New York. The figure of Onionhead is supposed to represent "peeling our feelings, as a way of healing our feelings." Onionhead's motto is: "peel it—feel it—heal it."
In 2014, the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission sued a company for forcing its employees to participate in Onionhead-related religious activities. From businessinsurance.com:
The EEOC said Syosset, New York-based United Health Programs of America Inc. and its parent company, Cost Containment Group Inc., which provide customer service on behalf of various insurance providers, has coerced employees to participate in ongoing religious activities since 2007, including group prayers, candle burning and discussions of “spiritual” tests.
The EEOC said the religious practices are part of a belief system that the defendants’ family members created called “Onionhead.” It said employees were told to wear Onionhead buttons, pull Onionhead cards to place near their work stations, and keep only dim lighting in the workplace, none of which was work-related. Employees who opposed taking part in these religious activities or did not participate fully were terminated, the agency said.
Paul Di Filippo
Paul has been paid to put weird ideas into fictional form for over thirty years, in his career as a noted science fiction writer. He has recently begun blogging on many curious topics with three fellow writers at The Inferior 4+1.