Comments
Listed in chronological order. Newest comments at the end.

They tested this stuff on dogs first and most of them had enough sense not to eat it! :barfingsmiley:

I guess they just can't see any reason for anyone to die happy! Eat this crap and live forever.

Oh Paul, how could you? Bad enough I have to get up in the morning, but now I know there's vegan bacon in the world...

That vegan bacon is on eggs... so I guess it is for vegans who love bacon and eggs for breakfast. As long as that breakfast doesn't include any part of a living animal.

Man, why can't I get Hufu instead.
http://www.museumofhoaxes.com/hoax/weblog/comments/3167/

My bad! Let's call it "vegetarian bacon."

Better idea, let's call it "bacrapon"!

You see, this just proves vegetarians are evil. They take a baby-brightening, love-inducing, heart-helping, world-cooling superfood like bacon and strip all of the good things out - including any flavour - to leave textured, coloured strips of squashed vegetable matter.

That's like swapping someone's antviral medicine for a placebo. Evil!

Virgil, I found hufu very disappointing, it tasted nothing like I remembered.
(T-shirt was cool though.)

Remove that VEGAN MADNESS form this site. Those people should be punished for witchcraft. They're EVIL i say E V I L

HAHA The reason you love bacon and have such fond memories is because you were told to by a propagandist. He is also the guy who helped overthrow the Guatemalan government so The United Fruit Company (now Chiquita)could exploit slave labor.

"The company brutally exploited virtual slave labor in order to produce cheap bananas for the lucrative U.S. market."

And if your version of dieing happy is eating bacon then you deserve to die because you are a miserable, miserable human being. Heart Helping? HAHAHA Oh man I'm gonna have to remember that. Heart Attacks, what a beautiful way to die, immense pain, the sadness of family members by a sudden death, and if your lucky you will throw up all over yourself. The doctor should have prescribed them Bacon! Here's a little more from your bacon peddling friend.

"One of Bernays' favorite techniques for manipulating public opinion was the indirect use of "third party authorities" to plead his clients' causes. "If you can influence the leaders, either with or without their conscious cooperation, you automatically influence the group which they sway", he said. In order to promote sales of bacon, for example, he conducted a survey of physicians and reported their recommendation that people eat heavy breakfasts. He sent the results of the survey to 5,000 physicians, along with publicity touting bacon and eggs as a heavy breakfast."

"Combining the ideas of Gustave Le Bon and Wilfred Trotter on crowd psychology with the psychoanalytical ideas of his uncle, Dr. Sigmund Freud, Bernays was one of the first to attempt to manipulate public opinion using the subconscious."

I knew it was News of Weird, didn't know the comments would be weirder. How old are you? I feel sorry for your children, but hopefully you don't have any.

Here is a little more on dying by Heart Attack for ya.

"Pain, dyspnoea and low mood were reported to have been experienced by more than half the patients in their last year of life. Anxiety, constipation, nausea/vomiting, urinary incontinence and faecal incontinence, although not suffered by the majority of patients, also caused much distress. Hospital symptom control was reported to be limited: little or no symptom relief was reported for 35% patients with pain, 31% with constipation, 24% with dyspnoea and 24% with nausea/vomiting. Nevertheless, high levels of satisfaction with hospital staff were reported. CONCLUSIONS: Patients dying from heart disease experience a wide range of symptoms, which are frequently distressing, and often last for more than six months."

What a Happy way to die. I'm still in shock of how dumb that comment was.

Yeah, because bacon tastes terrible and none of us would eat it if we weren't grossly manipulated.

I'm an omnivore who eats vegetarian products, and I have tried vegetarian bacon. It's no substitute for the real thing straight up but might suffice if you were crumbling it and adding to recipes, omelets, etc.

The perfect accompaniment :




EWWWWW !!!

Food Rule #6:

If the box says {delicious food} "style," said product must be avoided at all costs.

By the way, I can't tell, is Travis trying to be funny or does he actually believe what he is saying?

travis, take a pill dude. at some point we all die, regardless of what we eat or do. some sooner some later, but a run away bus will kill someone with a healthy heart just as well. there are no guarantees so make yourself happy in life if possible. oh and thanks for the description of a heart attack, but i'm already familiar. i saw my father have a couple, was even alone with him during one (i was 4) and called for help. in the end he dies of a heart attack i was 8. i'm sure he just ate too much bacon since it's all that simple.

now on a serious note- vegan bacon is to real bacon as rag weed is to roses. or to borrow from bill engval (he was refering to soy bacon)it tastes like bacon, no it don't it tastes like a bacon flavored turd.

Is everyone in Texas a twat or are they just having a convention there this week?!

Handy reference: "The heart-helping, hangover-curing, early-rising, planet-saving bacon - that also helps you make (smarter) babies". Also available as jerky, vodka, candy and ice-cream.

i knew you wouldn't let anyone malign bacon like that dumbfounded. texas twats- sounds like minor league baseball team.

I imagine "the Texas Hard-of-Ironys" would look a bit long on the shirts. But I guess we shouldn't be too cruel, he's probably new and doesn't know about the long-running bacon theme on WU.

Seriously though, it is of course possible to overindulge on bacon just as it is anything else. Though in bacon's case that does involve slapping a few rashers between two fillets of southern fried chicken, a la KFC's "double-down" sandwich.

Personally, I never eat more than three at a sitting!

it's been a long time since i visited. changed jobs and moved house. glad to hear everyone is still obsessed w/ bacon, and everyone is still giving twats like travis a hard time! like i never left!

mrjazz! sweetie i've missed you! i hope the move was relatively painless and the new job is great.

One of our vegan freinds brought some of this to a picnic recently. Everyone who tried it said that it tasted fine. Of course, it was cooked in about an inch of real bacon grease (someone brought the real thing, too), so that may have had something to do with it. The assertion was that it was still vegan, based on some sort of homeopathic principle.