Chuck’s Hand-Picked Overnight Weird News for Monday

Pakistani legislator speaks up for cultural diversity
"These are centuries-old traditions, and I will continue to defend them," said Hon. Israr Ullah Zehri. Mainly, he was speaking of the right of a tribe to punish girls who want to pick their own husbands. The latest punishment, about a month ago in a remote village, was that the five girls were shot, then buried alive in a ditch. Associated Press via New York Daily News
Comments 'buried_alive'

Lawsuit: Amtrak ought to have saved me from my sorry, drunken butt
A 25-yr-old New York man took 27,500 volts after climbing to the top of an idle Amtrak car in Boston in 2006 and lost an arm and a leg to burns. That was mostly Amtrak's fault, he now says in court, because, hey, trespassing happens; sometimes, railroad cars need to be climbed on top of. New York Post
Comments 'amtrak_zapped'

The flip side of that "last lecture" professor: the Australian pastor with terminal cancer who inspired hundreds of thousands . . to send him money so he could buy porn
Sydney pastor Michael Guglielmucci has finally come clean after two yrs of playing a fully-immersed cancer patient, including pulling his hair out and developing the ability to vomit on cue. It was all a scheme to fund his 16-yr porn obsession. He fooled his wife, too, but now she defends him, insisting that his two-year fake-out tore him up so much that he was almost as miserable as if he'd had cancer. Daily Telegraph (Sydney)
Comments 'cancer_porn'

India has its extremes of rich and poor, but maybe they think differently about it than we do
Vogue India just ran a photo feature some of the dirt-poor (a half-billion people subsist on less than $1.25 a day) modeling the fanciest of goods (Fendi, Burberry, Hermes), e.g., a woman with a handbag that sells for almost 3 yrs' income to her. Vulgar? Said a Western marketing exec specializing in India and China, it's "a very Western attitude" for rich people not to flaunt their wealth. In China and other emerging markets, he said, 'If you've made it, you want everyone to know you've made it,' and luxury brands are the easiest way to do that." New York Times
Comments 'india_vogue'

Two new church campaigns to put more fannies in the pews
In Manassas, Va., Pastor Rob Seagears's summer sermon series involved dressing up and channeling characters from whichever movie was number-one at the box office that week, and then tying that message to God. Easy: "Dark Night" (with its built-in morality). Harder: "Hellboy II." Hardest: "Tropic Thunder" (the black preacher as a white actor playing a black soldier). And in the UK, the management of Birmingham Cathedral has turned all entrepreneurial, setting out to create a chain of wine bars and branded merchandise to, er, lift the church's profile and raise money for community work. Washington Post // Daily Mail (London)
Comments 'seagears_winebar'

Your Daily Losers
Two men were badly burned when their car blew up in Anderson, S.C. They were huffing keyboard cleaner and had rolled the windows up to keep out all that noxious fresh air, but then one of the men decided he needed a cigarette. WHNS-TV (Greenville)
Comments 'huffing_explosion'

People Whose Sex Lives Are Worse Than Yours
Christopher Sullivan, 43, told police in Oshkosh, Wis., that he is a sexual predator but that he is all talk and that women have nothing to fear because actually crossing the line to rape would be a "grave sin." So his talk consists so far, police say, of stealing underwear, sending women photos of Barbie dolls with heads cut off, and making low-tech Photoshop-type porn (i.e., with scissors and paste). The Northwestern (Oshkosh)
Comments 'christopher_sullivan'

Your Daily Jury Duty
[no fair examining the evidence; verdict must be based on mugshot only]
Jeffrey Mitchell was arrested on drug charges in Middleburg, Fla. (just south of Jacksonville). Now, just because he is the 225-yr-old vampire named Draven does not mean he's guilty of the drug charges. FirstCoastNews.com (Jacksonville)
Comments 'jeffrey_mitchell'

Eyewitness News
[news videos goin' around]
From Colombia, an 11-month-old boy who weighs, er, 61 lbs. (a genetic thingie makes his bones grow too fast.) Independent Television News
Comments '11lb_baby'

More Things to Worry About on Monday
In Scotland, there's actually an annual speed-eating contest for haggis (which is, of course, one of the world's ugliest foods), with 1 lb. downed in just over two minutes (and even one Californian in the contest!) . . . . . And speaking of that, "haggis" appeared on the top-20 list of regional UK ice cream flavors (along with "sausage & mash," "Welsh rarebit," and "Worcestershire sauce") . . . . . Mr. Jean Chery only had to spend a day and a half in an F State jail until New York authorities decided he wasn't the fugitive Ms. Jean Chery . . . . . Recurring Theme: Once again, an earnest citizen found a bomb (actually, 32 dynamite-stick-sized bombs) and dutifully brought them down to the police station and laid them on the counter . . . . . Perfect karma: The Nolita nightspot in lower Manhattan drives the apartment-dwellers next door nuts with the noise, but fortunately for them, the Nolita has this neat glass-roof sunroom, which is "accessible" by men with strong streams standing on their balconies. Today's Newsrangers: Debra Taylor, Ben Hestir, Steve Miller, Emory Kimbrough
Comments 'worry_080901'

Editor's Note
Tomorrow will be the last malaise day of the summer. I'll be back on 6-day schedule starting Wednesday.
     Posted By: Chuck - Mon Sep 01, 2008
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