Ferguson Safety Smock

Why you should buy a Ferguson Safety Smock:

They're virtually indestructible.
They have no hard fasteners that can be filed into weapons.
They have no nylon hook-and-loop fasteners that can be torn off and used as a rope.
They include a sanitary belt "designed for self-destructive females on their menses."
Plus, they make a great fashion statement!

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Alex Boese Alex is the creator and curator of the Museum of Hoaxes. He's also the author of various weird, non-fiction, science-themed books such as Elephants on Acid and Psychedelic Apes. Paul Di Filippo Paul has been paid to put weird ideas into fictional form for over forty years, in his career as a noted science fiction writer. Contact Us

Posted By: Alex - Tue Apr 28, 2009
Category: Fashion | Prisons

Comments

They are stylish, though, aren't they?

Posted by kingmonkey in Athens, Ontario on 04/28/09 at 08:41 AM

Dumbfounded: People in prison don't pay taxes.

Posted by Paul in Athens GA on 04/28/09 at 08:49 AM

A satisfied customer says: "In 10 years using 15 blankets, 7 smocks and 1 sleeping bag I have replaced only 1 strip of Velcro on 1 smock. These wear like iron and clean like a dream."
– Tina Potts, Laundry Specialist

So, they wear like iron? That can't be comfortable. And... why would a laundry specialist need these?

Posted by Nethie on 04/28/09 at 12:41 PM

The couple in the photo are the company CEO and his bride.

Trust me.

Posted by Paul in Athens GA on 04/28/09 at 01:33 PM

"Brought to you by, the Old Testament!" :lol:

Seriously, Beardy McGee up there looks like he's ready to wander the desert for a few decades...or he just got back.

Posted by Jmonkeh on 04/29/09 at 08:16 AM

apparently driving is out of the question..

Posted by mrjazz on 04/29/09 at 07:25 PM

Perfect for all your dungeon imprisonment needs! Got a daughter you want to lock up in the cellar for 20 years? We have the solution to keep her subdued!!

Posted by MohawkWarrior on 04/30/09 at 11:02 PM

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