Meet the Candidates

Expanding on the theme of strange candidates, here are some of the candidates that are (or were) seeking your vote in the current presidential election.

Gene Amondson, Prohibition Party
Amondson is running on a single issue: bringing back prohibition. He describes prohibition as "America's Best Years."

Donald K. Allen, Independent
One of the few candidates to have a position on puppy mills: "As President, I would appoint a secretary of agriculture that would effectively shut down puppy mills through true enforcement of existing law and national educational exposure of this despicable business. Instead of working from the bottom up, I would effectively mandate the dismantling of commercial interstate puppy trade from the top. This would be a no- or low-priority issue for any other candidate."

Bruce Bongardt, The Proudican Party
Bongardt describes himself as "a 42 year old middleclass creative problem-solving Mechanical Design Engineer." He describes the Proudican Party as "a new, self-started party focused on sustaining US Democracy principles through an independent platform of boldly aggressive technology-based prolutions (progressive solutions)." Some of his "prolutions" include expanding the standard week to 9 days and transitioning the currency to e-money.

James Harlin Carter, The Real Food Party
"The Real Food Party seeks to revise existing regulations to allow the sale of non-pasteurized milk and other 'food that is helpful.'" Carter has conceded that he's not going to win the 2008 election. Therefore, he's not going to participate in any debates and has no plans to raise any money.

Terry Lee "Tee" Barkdull, Unaffiliated

Matthew Borman, The American Party
Borman writes: "I am Matthew Borman. I am a 36 year old, who since the age of 14, had to work in order to survive. From the age that I was old enough to recognize government; the excitement about the politician, the writing of new law or the formation of government social program has eluded me. I am a simple working man. The people who seem so int rested in Governing my life have caused more hurt than help with their years of law making."
Borman has many positions, but apparently improving spelling and grammar is not one of them.

Jeff Boss, The Independent Party
Boss is going for the conspiracy theorist vote: "My Goal is to Save America, and make it a democracy again. I witnessed a person high up in the NSA planning the 9/11 attack. They were talking about helping Ramsi Yousef (responsible for the 93 bombing at the World Trade Center) call his uncle Kolid Sheik Mohammed (considered the mastermind of the 911 attack) from the NSA secret prison in Alexandria, VA, and they were talking about flying planes into buildings."

John Taylor Bowles, National Socialist Order of America
Going for the Nazi vote. From Wikipedia: "Bowles runs his campaign out of the "Redneck Shop" in Laurens, South Carolina, which features Nazi, Confederate States of America and KKK paraphernalia. As of March 2008, Bowles is the only listed individual contributor to his campaign." (Bowles suffered a heart attack in July, so he's off the ticket.)
Posted By: Alex - Tue Sep 23, 2008
Category: Politics, Strange Candidates

I'm going with the Prohibition Party. If you thought Al and the boys were having fun with the Tommy gun wait for the reality shows we'll be seeing with all this new stuff on the market today! Talk about "America's Best Years"!?!

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants."
Thomas Jefferson
Posted by Expat47 in Athens, Greece on 09/24/08 at 12:42 AM
Is it just me, or does Bowles look like Henry Gibson in "The Blues Brothers"?
Posted by Joe Littrell on 09/24/08 at 01:29 AM
Hey, that's 20 or 30 more votes than you'll get Mark!

Hey, do you guys have a clown party? I'd consider moving to the US to vote for them.
Posted by kingmonkey in Athens, Ontario on 09/24/08 at 11:38 AM
Clowns are creepy. I'll have to emmigrate if they're in charge of this country.
Posted by Jules in Connecticut on 09/24/08 at 12:03 PM
Jules -- ditto.

BTW, before I cast my vote, I need to know what structure Mr. Bongardt proposes for his 9 day week. If it has 4 or 5 days of weekend, I'm totally voting for him!!
Posted by BikerPuppy on 09/24/08 at 12:22 PM
Sorry, Kaymyth, I'm a lifelong supporter of the Slightly Silly Party.

Kevin Phillips-Bong in '08!
Posted by kingmonkey in Athens, Ontario on 09/25/08 at 02:34 PM
Commenting is no longer available for this post.
Weird Universe

Follow Us

All original content in posts is Copyright © 2016 by the author of the post, which is usually either Alex Boese ("Alex"), Paul Di Filippo ("Paul"), or Chuck Shepherd ("Chuck"). All rights reserved. The banner illustration at the top of this page is Copyright © 2008 by Rick Altergott.