Only In Illinois #2

Joliet's Finest Represent!: While at a conference for the International Police Mountain Bike Association in New Mexico, Officer John Hanke, with three other officers, decided that three drinks wasn't enough to impair his ability to drive. Bonus: It was a government vehicle. Double bonus money quote: "They allowed a sober person in the vehicle to take possession of it and did not tow the vehicle," Herald News

Rosemont Police were surprised at the number and type of drug arrests at the Grateful Dead shows Monday and Tuesday at the All-State Arena. You mean people still drop and sell acid at Dead shows? We'd never have guessed. Daily Herald

Life Imitates Ar...er, Sports: Apparently there weren't enough fights at the hockey game, so Stanley Drasky, 41, started one with his wife in the parking lot after the game. Not to be outdone, Mrs. Drasky decided hubby didn't need to be in that squad car and went for the door more than once, pushing the officer away when he tried to close it. We all know what happened next. Chicago Sun-Times

The Illinois River doesn't seem very safe to Jet Ski in. Just ask Tad Newell, who was knocked off his Jet Ski by an asian carp. Luckily, Tad thought ahead when he packed his cellphone and thus was able to call for a rescue when he couldn't get the Jet Ski restarted. Peoria Journal-Star
     Posted By: Reverend Ira - Fri May 08, 2009
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Comments
With all the organized crime in Illinois, that asian carp may have been part of the Yu-kuza!

(Yu is Chinese for fish.)
Posted by kingmonkey in Athens, Ontario on 05/08/09 at 04:05 PM
Rosemont: Seconded only by Widespread Panic in the fan's (called "Spread Heads") drug and alcohol use before, during and after the show.
Posted by Paul in Athens GA on 05/08/09 at 05:02 PM
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