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News of the Weird Daily
Monday, February 23, 2009

Oklahomans need more protection than you
The legislature is on the verge of banning eyeball tattoos (which sound hoaxy, anyway, but apparently are real) because senators worry about the danger even "if . . . one person" does it. So far, the other 49 states don't believe any of their people are dumb enough to let someone prick their scleras. London's The Sun has the photo of someone getting one, from a year ago. KSBI-TV (Oklahoma City) /// The Sun
Comments 'eyeball_tattoos'

More Things to Worry About

Cliché Come to Life: Charming New York art dealer Mark Zaplin said it's not his fault if those nuns he bought the $2.2M painting from for $450,000 don't have any business sense. [Ed.: Wait, what's the cliché here? Oh, yeah, I forgot: Zaplin's doomed, according to two dozen or so horror movies.] New York Post

Life Is Too Long: (1) John Allwood, 29, broke his own world record by smashing 47 watermelons over his head at the Chinchilla Melon Festival in Australia. (2) So far, 18,000 have signed up to watch, over the 'net, the first-ever live birth of an elephant. Australian Broadcasting Corp. News /// Agence France-Presse via Yahoo

Undignified Death: A 28-yr-old man was run over on Miami's Palmetto Expressway in the middle of the night after he fell off an over-the-highway sign he was tagging. (Upstate, in Fort Walton Beach, a 25-yr-old man didn't quite cross over . . yet, anyway . . in his try, but he did get arrested for trespass because apparently he had to use his neighbor's garage to gas himself.) WPLG-TV (Miami) /// Northwest Florida Daily News

Recurring Themes: (1) A high official at OSHA ($150k/yr) has been on paid leave for nearly 19 months with utterly no work to do after a spit-spat with his boss. (2) An Arkansas insurance company is the latest to deny an employee's worker compensation claim because the employee, on the job but in violation of the rules, was badly injured when he went to help a female customer who was getting beaten up. Washington Post /// KLRT-TV (Little Rock)

Comments on Things to Worry About?
Comments 'worry_090223'

Your Daily Loser
Bad enough that David Kocmit, 27, falsely told police that he had been beaten up by three black men in the parking lot of a strip club in Cleveland. Worse that there was surveillance video proving that there was no attack and that Kocmit had just stumbled and fallen on his face. Worse yet that when confronted with the video, Kocmit still wouldn't give his story up. Plain Dealer
Comments 'david_kocmit'

People Whose Sex Lives Are Worse Than Yours
Public wankers: Danny Lovvern, 34, Belleville, Ill., accused of standing outside his house "every" morning and saluting the little kids walking by to school. And then there's Aussie Kevin Loomes, 58, who (yikes!) used to be media director for Queensland gov't's emergency services. Belleville News-Democrat /// Australian Associated Press via Herald Sun (Melbourne)

And this guy's is way-worse than yours: He reported to the ER at Huntsville (Ala.) Hospital last Wednesday with a crochet needle in his urethra. AWI, but still . . .. News Courier (Athens, Ala.)
Comments 'lovvern_loomes'

Today's Newsrangers: Tom Norris, Jerry Whittle, Sandy Pearlman, Stephen Taylor, Don Schullian

     Posted By: Chuck - Mon Feb 23, 2009

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