Walking Zombie Syndrome

Do you feel dull and listless? Have you lost interest in everything? Do people describe you as "dead wood"? You may be suffering from Walking Zombie Syndrome. First described in the Journal of the Tennessee Medical Association, Dec 1979:

these individuals carry around with them in their unconscious mind a death suggestion, while on the conscious level they have no knowledge whatsoever of it. In fact, when told they believe themselves dead they deny it even though their symptoms and their behavior continually affirm the diagnosis of the Walking Zombie syndrome...

Walking Zombies are present on the streets of every city, and not a single practitioner will escape their complaints. Even though they may faithfully attempt work every day, they are for the most part nonproductive and often represent more of a liability than an asset to their employers, families and friends. Many are accident prone, and most Walking Zombies cost their company a great deal by chronic absenteeism.
     Posted By: Alex - Thu Mar 26, 2009
     Category: Death | Psychology

Is it possible to have this syndrome only before 10am everyday?
Posted by Jules in Connecticut on 03/26/09 at 08:22 AM
I am plagued with this every Monday. Well, Tuesdays too. Sometimes on Wednesday...oh screw it! I guess I face this everyday except the weekends. So what does that mean? Can this condition be directly related to work?
Posted by Madd Maxx on 03/26/09 at 08:36 AM
Maybe the problem is the lack of brain flavored coffee creamer. Tell the zombies its brain juice, they'll chug it down and BAM! Cured.
Posted by Matt in Florida on 03/26/09 at 10:38 AM
I live on coffee and Pepsi Max and still fit the bill. What do I do now, <strike>Ophra</strike> Paul?
Posted by Expat47 in Athens, Greece on 03/26/09 at 10:42 AM
It should be noted that sufferers of the later diagnosed, but rarer, "Jazzercising Zombie Syndrome" are a much greater liability in the work place.
Posted by Pablo on 03/26/09 at 11:58 AM
Pablo! Welcome back man!
Where'd you find the psycho killer depressed barbie troop?
Posted by Jules in Connecticut on 03/26/09 at 12:13 PM
As a graphic/web designer I've perfected the art of google image searching. ****LIVE FEED: I'm at a library at the moment and some dude just ripped a huge fart! BACK TO YOU PAUL**** Yeah so, I think I searched "gymnast zombie" after failing for a quick hit with "fitness zombie". I really wanted a zombie in leg warmers donning wrist and head bands. Oh well. There were strangely a lot of sites pertaining to zombie fitness. I didn't take the time to fully investigate though.

Thanks for the welcome back Jules. I have been lurking around in the shadows of Weird Universe but didn't have the time at hand to comment as much as I once did. I just got back from work in the F-State and I'll see what I can do to shake things up a bit.
Posted by Pablo on 03/26/09 at 12:35 PM
"You're suffering from Walking Zombie Syndrome!"

"No, I'm not."

"Ah-ha! Denial-- he's definitely suffering from WZS."

This kind of psychology really pisses me off. Beside, zombiism isn't caused by workaday stress; it's caused by aliens firing probes into their pinion pituitaries and raising them from the dead.
Posted by kingmonkey in Athens, Ontario on 03/26/09 at 12:54 PM
I suspect that WU may actually be WZS Central.
Posted by BikerPuppy on 03/26/09 at 01:53 PM
and what may i ask puts the suggestion that one is actually dead in one's subconsious? is there an approved psyciatric treatment, in addition to medicinal coffee use of course?

pablo welcome back from the f-state! you must have stories, i mean it is the f-state and all. 😊
Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 03/26/09 at 05:57 PM
jules and maxx i think many of us suffer from the milder form MZS- morning zombie syndrome. that is the one that is particularly caffene responsive. sugar also helps and chocolate is great being a hybrid- sugar and caffene. that along with a dose of wu to wake your brain and funny bone and by noon or 1pm you are good as new! :lol:
Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 03/26/09 at 06:05 PM
IV Drip of Caffeine! HA! I thought that was reserved for hackers, hard core table top gamers and parents of newborns. Sarah, I guess I have a new group to add to that. Welcome aboard!

You're dead!

There, anyone who has read this post has just had the idea put in their head. Mwah ha ha ha ha!!!
Posted by DownCrisis on 03/26/09 at 10:59 PM
This explains so much about you people. :lol:
Posted by Nethie on 03/26/09 at 11:09 PM
downcrisis that's not the idea i wanted you to put in my head sweetheart! 😜

nethie we are not 'you people' we are 'caffinated-americans' :lol:
Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 03/26/09 at 11:14 PM
oh, Sorry patty, I was just trying to pretend there was some difference between you guys and myself, (as if!) 😜
Posted by Nethie on 03/26/09 at 11:17 PM
haitian coffee girls?
Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 03/27/09 at 07:02 AM
i like tea sometimes too. 😊
Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 03/27/09 at 04:01 PM
You guys and your coffee.... if you really want to get rid of the morning walking zombie syndrome, just down a big ice cold diet coke immediately after waking. I've done this for years. In fact, if I'd thought to buy stock in coca-cola back in the day, I might be a billionaire now :shut:
Posted by Skitt in SW USA on 03/27/09 at 05:06 PM
i just can't drink pop in the morning, it makes me sick. my hubby drinks it even with pancakes and syrup. yuck!
Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 03/27/09 at 11:23 PM
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