Last Week in Weird (August 3, 2014)
Last Week in Weird
datelines (mostly) 7/25/2014--8/2/2014 (Part I)
[Links, chronological, on Extended page]
Copyright 2014 by Chuck Shepherd. All rights reserved.
[Ed. Note: There’s no coding here. I hate to code. However, Links to each story (14 in all) are on the Extended page, in chronological order. Yeah, yeah, I know it’s failing to exploit the blogging technology. Tough.]
While You Were Busy Last Week Watching Cat Videos: A New York Times reporter chronicled in fascinating detail how France, Spain, Austria, and Switzerland (at least, but maybe other EU countries) (but not US and the UK) have been bankrolling worldwide Al Qaeda for yrs ($125m!) by back-channel-paying ransoms for their kidnaped citizens. “Rag-tag jihadists”? Try “astonishingly meticulous criminal gangs.” Abdul only got $1m for his bounty? That’s a Fail, and he’s out of the club because the going rate, according to the manual, is $4m-$8m. (Bonus: For those critical of Israel’s mega-assault on Hamas, hey, the “tunnels” that so worry Israel weren’t designed for commerce or munitions; they were to facilitate kidnaping of Israelis and holding them below for concessions--because Hamas knows that Israel is the world leader in not leaving its people behind.)
And, Now, The “News”:
Police in Ohio County, W.Va., stopped a middle-aged couple on a mid-day stroll--she in a purple nightgown, leading a leashed, hooded man on all fours with ankles bound. Relax, she (“B. J.” Geardello) said; it’s a turn-on for him.
Slow Americans: (1) The head of the Nomen Global Language center (ESL specialists) in Ogden, Utah, fired Tim Torkildson because Tim dared used the word “homophones” correctly. (2) It’s really simple in every state in America to legally change your name. So why is this investigator for the Ohio state auditor’s office still named Jim Longerbone?
Think Your Last Plane Flight Was Unpleasant? In May, it was a legitimate assistance dog who dropped a log in the aisle, and last week (though details are still not confirmed) it was on a Delta flight from Beijing to Detroit that a Chinese couple laid down some paper in the cabin for their granddaughter’s potty.
People With Too Much Money: Celestis (the company that periodically blasts rockets containing customers’ ashes into deep space) said they’re accepting ashes of departed pets ($995, or if it’s important to shoot them to the actual moon, $12,000).
Redneck Chronicles: See your ex-boyfriend with his new gal? That’s a pummeling, topped off by grabbing his “dip spit” cup and emptying it on his head.
The Challenge of Governing Alaska: Vote on a tax referendum, and you have to pay to translate the ballots into Yu’pik, Inupiak, Siberian Yupik, Koyukon Athabascan, and Gwich’in Athabascan. (“Una-qaa alerquun ciuniurumannilli?”) (Everybody knows that means, “Should this law be rejected?”)
Cultural Diversity: It should be clear by now to everyone that U.S. teenagers are generally less sophisticated than, say, uncontacted South American tribes. Evidence: A 15-yr-old in Lexington, Ky., just set himself on fire, challenged by a YouTube video. “What they don’t show” on the video is the 2nd and 3rd degree burns that result. What did you think would happen, kid? “I don’t know. I wasn’t thinking, really.”
Perspective: U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service has new regulations modestly cracking down on ivory imports to perhaps lamely slow down the ugly poaching of African elephants for their tusks (nearly 50,000 poaching deaths in the last 2 yrs). But the Nat’l Rifle Association is fighting it--because it fears interference with our God-given right to buy antique, pearl-handled handguns.
Unlucky Jerrod Christian was charged with theft and burglary for stealing from his neighbors--discovered when the tornado that hit Kingsport, Tenn., last week scattered the neighbors’ (former) possessions all over Jerrod’s yard.
Religious Messages: Pastor Scott Williams of the Christian Assemblies International of New South Wales state in Australia was ratted out by ex-members in an Australian Broadcasting Corp. investigation as claiming “the Lord’s authorization to sidestep biblical commands against homosexuality and [to] sexually train his male members into submission and obedience.”
And Another: EPA versus God, playing out in Alabama: EPA: Reduce your carbon emissions. Alabama: We’re a coal state. In fact, God is the one who put all the coal here. EPA: Ehh--. Alabama: No problem; we’ll just pray away the regulations, “Heavenly Father . . .”. (Bonus: The president of the Alabama Public Service Commission is Ms. Twinkle Andress Cavanaugh.)
Part II on Monday. Hasta . . ."
http://www.nytimes.com/2014/07/30/world/africa/ransoming-citizens-europe-becomes-al-qaedas-patron.html?smid=tw-bna&assetType=nyt_now&_r=1
http://pittsburgh.cbslocal.com/2014/07/30/naked-man-on-leash-in-w-va-could-face-charges/
http://www.sltrib.com/sltrib/politics/58236366-90/says-english-homophones-language.html.csp?ItsLatinYouAss
http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/local/2014/07/30/investigator-was-dating-data-chief.html
http://www.kctv5.com/story/25654369/dog-pooping-on-plane-forces-diversion-to-kansas-citys-airport
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2708316/Airline-passengers-kick-stink-Delta-flight-Beijing-Detroit-Chinese-family-let-toddler-DEFECATE-seat.html
http://dfw.cbslocal.com/2014/07/30/texas-firm-offers-space-flights-for-pet-remains/
http://offthebeat.blogs.tcpalm.com/2014/07/29/669/
http://p.washingtontimes.com/news/2014/jul/29/alaskas-native-language-challenge-translating-tax-/
http://www.wkyt.com/home/headlines/Lexington-teen-burns-himself-during-prank-268649152.html
http://www.thepetitionsite.com/899/515/190/tell-congress-elephants-are-more-important-than-ivory-pistol-grips/?z00m=21349912
http://abcnews.go.com/US/tennessee-tornado-helps-bust-neighborly-thief-police-charge/story?id=24762348
http://www.abc.net.au/news/2014-07-28/former-members-break-silence-over-christian-cult-of-horrors/5627794
http://www.al.com/news/index.ssf/2014/07/post_14.html
datelines (mostly) 7/25/2014--8/2/2014 (Part I)
[Links, chronological, on Extended page]
Copyright 2014 by Chuck Shepherd. All rights reserved.
[Ed. Note: There’s no coding here. I hate to code. However, Links to each story (14 in all) are on the Extended page, in chronological order. Yeah, yeah, I know it’s failing to exploit the blogging technology. Tough.]
While You Were Busy Last Week Watching Cat Videos: A New York Times reporter chronicled in fascinating detail how France, Spain, Austria, and Switzerland (at least, but maybe other EU countries) (but not US and the UK) have been bankrolling worldwide Al Qaeda for yrs ($125m!) by back-channel-paying ransoms for their kidnaped citizens. “Rag-tag jihadists”? Try “astonishingly meticulous criminal gangs.” Abdul only got $1m for his bounty? That’s a Fail, and he’s out of the club because the going rate, according to the manual, is $4m-$8m. (Bonus: For those critical of Israel’s mega-assault on Hamas, hey, the “tunnels” that so worry Israel weren’t designed for commerce or munitions; they were to facilitate kidnaping of Israelis and holding them below for concessions--because Hamas knows that Israel is the world leader in not leaving its people behind.)
And, Now, The “News”:
Police in Ohio County, W.Va., stopped a middle-aged couple on a mid-day stroll--she in a purple nightgown, leading a leashed, hooded man on all fours with ankles bound. Relax, she (“B. J.” Geardello) said; it’s a turn-on for him.
Slow Americans: (1) The head of the Nomen Global Language center (ESL specialists) in Ogden, Utah, fired Tim Torkildson because Tim dared used the word “homophones” correctly. (2) It’s really simple in every state in America to legally change your name. So why is this investigator for the Ohio state auditor’s office still named Jim Longerbone?
Think Your Last Plane Flight Was Unpleasant? In May, it was a legitimate assistance dog who dropped a log in the aisle, and last week (though details are still not confirmed) it was on a Delta flight from Beijing to Detroit that a Chinese couple laid down some paper in the cabin for their granddaughter’s potty.
People With Too Much Money: Celestis (the company that periodically blasts rockets containing customers’ ashes into deep space) said they’re accepting ashes of departed pets ($995, or if it’s important to shoot them to the actual moon, $12,000).
Redneck Chronicles: See your ex-boyfriend with his new gal? That’s a pummeling, topped off by grabbing his “dip spit” cup and emptying it on his head.
The Challenge of Governing Alaska: Vote on a tax referendum, and you have to pay to translate the ballots into Yu’pik, Inupiak, Siberian Yupik, Koyukon Athabascan, and Gwich’in Athabascan. (“Una-qaa alerquun ciuniurumannilli?”) (Everybody knows that means, “Should this law be rejected?”)
Cultural Diversity: It should be clear by now to everyone that U.S. teenagers are generally less sophisticated than, say, uncontacted South American tribes. Evidence: A 15-yr-old in Lexington, Ky., just set himself on fire, challenged by a YouTube video. “What they don’t show” on the video is the 2nd and 3rd degree burns that result. What did you think would happen, kid? “I don’t know. I wasn’t thinking, really.”
Perspective: U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service has new regulations modestly cracking down on ivory imports to perhaps lamely slow down the ugly poaching of African elephants for their tusks (nearly 50,000 poaching deaths in the last 2 yrs). But the Nat’l Rifle Association is fighting it--because it fears interference with our God-given right to buy antique, pearl-handled handguns.
Unlucky Jerrod Christian was charged with theft and burglary for stealing from his neighbors--discovered when the tornado that hit Kingsport, Tenn., last week scattered the neighbors’ (former) possessions all over Jerrod’s yard.
Religious Messages: Pastor Scott Williams of the Christian Assemblies International of New South Wales state in Australia was ratted out by ex-members in an Australian Broadcasting Corp. investigation as claiming “the Lord’s authorization to sidestep biblical commands against homosexuality and [to] sexually train his male members into submission and obedience.”
And Another: EPA versus God, playing out in Alabama: EPA: Reduce your carbon emissions. Alabama: We’re a coal state. In fact, God is the one who put all the coal here. EPA: Ehh--. Alabama: No problem; we’ll just pray away the regulations, “Heavenly Father . . .”. (Bonus: The president of the Alabama Public Service Commission is Ms. Twinkle Andress Cavanaugh.)
Part II on Monday. Hasta . . ."
http://www.nytimes.com/2014/07/30/world/africa/ransoming-citizens-europe-becomes-al-qaedas-patron.html?smid=tw-bna&assetType=nyt_now&_r=1
http://pittsburgh.cbslocal.com/2014/07/30/naked-man-on-leash-in-w-va-could-face-charges/
http://www.sltrib.com/sltrib/politics/58236366-90/says-english-homophones-language.html.csp?ItsLatinYouAss
http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/local/2014/07/30/investigator-was-dating-data-chief.html
http://www.kctv5.com/story/25654369/dog-pooping-on-plane-forces-diversion-to-kansas-citys-airport
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2708316/Airline-passengers-kick-stink-Delta-flight-Beijing-Detroit-Chinese-family-let-toddler-DEFECATE-seat.html
http://dfw.cbslocal.com/2014/07/30/texas-firm-offers-space-flights-for-pet-remains/
http://offthebeat.blogs.tcpalm.com/2014/07/29/669/
http://p.washingtontimes.com/news/2014/jul/29/alaskas-native-language-challenge-translating-tax-/
http://www.wkyt.com/home/headlines/Lexington-teen-burns-himself-during-prank-268649152.html
http://www.thepetitionsite.com/899/515/190/tell-congress-elephants-are-more-important-than-ivory-pistol-grips/?z00m=21349912
http://abcnews.go.com/US/tennessee-tornado-helps-bust-neighborly-thief-police-charge/story?id=24762348
http://www.abc.net.au/news/2014-07-28/former-members-break-silence-over-christian-cult-of-horrors/5627794
http://www.al.com/news/index.ssf/2014/07/post_14.html
Comments
I don't know if I understand the new format, Chuck, the posts are up there in black and the links are down here in red and what order were they in again? This is so confusing I'm not sure I can navigate these puzzles so early in the AM when it's still BC.
NOTE: This was a public service post so all you wing-nuts need to is refer to it to voice your confusion.
NOTE: This was a public service post so all you wing-nuts need to is refer to it to voice your confusion.
Posted by Expat47 in Athens, Greece on 08/03/14 at 11:41 PM
Longerbone: maybe it's just Truth in Advertising. One of the actors in Harry Potter's first two films was Sean Biggerstaff. Bonus: he played Oliver Wood.
Posted by TheCannyScot in Atlanta, GA on 08/04/14 at 09:16 AM
Yea, not a fan of the new format. I get if it was a one-time thing due to being rushed or whatnot, but really hope it's not a trend.
Posted by JonasB on 08/04/14 at 10:16 AM
Modestly cracking down? It's become, as I recall, a felony to sell, or move to another state, any item that includes ivory, even if said ivory is 100 years old. This includes such things as pianos and firearms (the point of contention with the NRA). There is no allowance for ivory items that were legal when they were produced, merely a blanket ban on all ivory. This is hardly modest; it's more a symptom of our fascist government in action. If other .gov's would ban importation, perhaps it would help, but most likely not. We're apparently the only ones that'll sit still for this kind of repression.
Posted by Mr Evilwrench on 08/04/14 at 01:12 PM
Oh, so those Hamas tunnels were for kidnapping. Well then, I certainly do feel foolish for my disgust over the 300 children recently killed by our closet ally and beneficiary of $133 BILLION of our taxes. Boy is my face red.
Posted by Daldude on 08/04/14 at 04:53 PM
Mr Evilwrench,
There's that old saying about 'picking your battles'. If you are concerned about creeping fascism in the US government, you might want to turn your attention to:
1. A military budget that exceeds all the other countries in the world combined - including the maintenance of 662 military sites in 38 foreign countries
2 Domestic law enforcement that dresses, equips and conducts itself more and more like an occupying army (with no-knock raids increasing from 3000 in 1981 to more than 50000 in 2005), and 2.2 million people currently in prison (a 500% increase over the past thirty years).
3. Spy agencies that have been revealed to be illegally collecting data and communications on the entire domestic population (including the Congressional staff charged with investigating this data collection).
Historically, one or all of these governmental entities have been the ones responsible for the overthrow of democratic governments and the installation of tyrannical regimes. To my knowledge, there has NEVER been a coup conducted by a regulatory agency such as the US Fish & Wildlife service, nor - in all of recorded history - has the attempted protection of an endangered species led to the rise of a fascist dictatorship.
Paradoxically, so many of those claiming to advocate for 'small government' and personal liberty seem to unquestioningly support those 3 entities detailed at the top (sometimes to the point of accusing those who don't of somehow being treasonous), while railing against the few (and dwindling) government organizations specifically mandated to protect the powerless from the powerful (regulatory and environmental protection agencies, for example).
Strange, isn't it?
There's that old saying about 'picking your battles'. If you are concerned about creeping fascism in the US government, you might want to turn your attention to:
1. A military budget that exceeds all the other countries in the world combined - including the maintenance of 662 military sites in 38 foreign countries
2 Domestic law enforcement that dresses, equips and conducts itself more and more like an occupying army (with no-knock raids increasing from 3000 in 1981 to more than 50000 in 2005), and 2.2 million people currently in prison (a 500% increase over the past thirty years).
3. Spy agencies that have been revealed to be illegally collecting data and communications on the entire domestic population (including the Congressional staff charged with investigating this data collection).
Historically, one or all of these governmental entities have been the ones responsible for the overthrow of democratic governments and the installation of tyrannical regimes. To my knowledge, there has NEVER been a coup conducted by a regulatory agency such as the US Fish & Wildlife service, nor - in all of recorded history - has the attempted protection of an endangered species led to the rise of a fascist dictatorship.
Paradoxically, so many of those claiming to advocate for 'small government' and personal liberty seem to unquestioningly support those 3 entities detailed at the top (sometimes to the point of accusing those who don't of somehow being treasonous), while railing against the few (and dwindling) government organizations specifically mandated to protect the powerless from the powerful (regulatory and environmental protection agencies, for example).
Strange, isn't it?
Posted by Daldude on 08/04/14 at 05:40 PM
Daldude, You might want too ask yourself Why we've made the Israelis give back land that would have made this whole conflict moot NOT once but twice! If someone asks nicely I'll even post my map from 1978 where Israel controls virtually the whole Sinai! :lol: :coolsmile:
Evilwrench, Do a little research Dude, The CITES (convention on the International Trade in Endangered Species) is so full of holes when it comes to Ivory that it is widely considered to be an unenforceable joke, A bad one at that. If I put elephants on one side of a scale and your right to own an Ivory handled gun on the other the Elephants win every time. It's not even close! For cryin' out loud dude will you and your teabagger buddies just quiet down till you can find something intelligent to say! And that doesn't mean finding a new way to blame Obama for EVERYTHING! 😝 😕
Evilwrench, Do a little research Dude, The CITES (convention on the International Trade in Endangered Species) is so full of holes when it comes to Ivory that it is widely considered to be an unenforceable joke, A bad one at that. If I put elephants on one side of a scale and your right to own an Ivory handled gun on the other the Elephants win every time. It's not even close! For cryin' out loud dude will you and your teabagger buddies just quiet down till you can find something intelligent to say! And that doesn't mean finding a new way to blame Obama for EVERYTHING! 😝 😕
Posted by Tyrusguy on 08/04/14 at 06:21 PM
Joshua fit the battle....
Posted by Expat47 in Athens, Greece on 08/05/14 at 01:19 AM
Teenagers: oh, don't worry, that's not just your teenagers...
Elephants: ...but it is just your NRA.
Elephants: ...but it is just your NRA.
Posted by Richard Bos on 08/05/14 at 03:08 PM
Oh,believe me, I've had the rest of it up to the gills as well; those just weren't the topic here, whereas the ivory issue is a small but good example of them.
I know CITES is a joke, as is just about everything international in scope, which is why I mentioned that perhaps other national governments could grow a pair. Thing is, this regulation here is such an abortion that it's effectively trying to make things retroactively illegal. That's what I have a problem with.
I wouldn't use ivory for grips, even if I would use it for anything else (which I wouldn't); polymer or some kinds of wood are best.
Only thing I have with any ivory is a little antique Indian elephant statue that was made back when it was generally considered ok. So that makes me what, some kind of an offender? And where did that malignancy obama come into this? I absolutely will not be quiet, though I don't blame him for everything; he has a lot of stooges around suggesting things to him as well.
I know CITES is a joke, as is just about everything international in scope, which is why I mentioned that perhaps other national governments could grow a pair. Thing is, this regulation here is such an abortion that it's effectively trying to make things retroactively illegal. That's what I have a problem with.
I wouldn't use ivory for grips, even if I would use it for anything else (which I wouldn't); polymer or some kinds of wood are best.
Only thing I have with any ivory is a little antique Indian elephant statue that was made back when it was generally considered ok. So that makes me what, some kind of an offender? And where did that malignancy obama come into this? I absolutely will not be quiet, though I don't blame him for everything; he has a lot of stooges around suggesting things to him as well.
Posted by Mr Evilwrench on 08/06/14 at 09:17 AM
Evilwrench, I Didn't say CITES was a joke, Just the Ivory rules!
Overall CITES works well. It's just that they put in so many exceptions regarding ivory that those rules are easy to game.
As for the NRA I gave up my life-membership back in the early 80's when they were taken over by extreme right wing zealots! They used to be a good group based around gun safety and marksmanship/hunting issues! :lol: :coolsmile:
Overall CITES works well. It's just that they put in so many exceptions regarding ivory that those rules are easy to game.
As for the NRA I gave up my life-membership back in the early 80's when they were taken over by extreme right wing zealots! They used to be a good group based around gun safety and marksmanship/hunting issues! :lol: :coolsmile:
Posted by Tyrusguy on 08/06/14 at 09:53 AM
You mean when those concerned with preserving civil rights took over from the lame Fudds?
Posted by Mr Evilwrench on 08/07/14 at 12:26 AM
Evilwrench, I Say what I mean. That same document that guarantees your right to own a gun, Used to also guarantee your right to own another human being! The founding Fathers where just men, like any other NOT perfect. :coolmad:
Posted by Tyrusguy on 08/07/14 at 09:19 AM
Oh, so we should just throw the whole thing out, then? Just because they had something in it to reflect an unfortunate reality, the denial of which would have destroyed the whole effort? Look what it took to change it. "Property" was also replaced by "the pursuit of happiness" in order to appeal to those without massive estates.
It wasn't in the bill of rights anyway. Which of those affirmative rights is so objectionable to you? The second isn't about duck hunting, you know. I have the right to life, and demand the tools to defend it. I appreciate an organization that stands against those who would deny me those. Don't try to pretend they're not out there. The NRA does that now. The fudds are about duck hunting.
It wasn't in the bill of rights anyway. Which of those affirmative rights is so objectionable to you? The second isn't about duck hunting, you know. I have the right to life, and demand the tools to defend it. I appreciate an organization that stands against those who would deny me those. Don't try to pretend they're not out there. The NRA does that now. The fudds are about duck hunting.
Posted by Mr Evilwrench on 08/07/14 at 10:52 PM
Evilwrench, You seem intent on putting words in my mouth, Why?
My point regarding the Founding Fathers was that they existed in a different time, As you said as well. Not every right that was desirable or even necessary at that time is desired or needed today!
You seem to get that RE: slaves, Why not guns! 😖 :coolsmile:
Too be clear some of the best times of my life involve the shooting sports and guns, I DO support the second amendment! I also believe that we MUST as A NATION reform our laws RE: Guns to include Registration and background checks on ALL purchases/purchasers.
I also support an old proposal that was called GUN-DNA, That was the firing and storage of a round from each gun in a database like CODIS.
That way the pieces of evidence left at gun crime scenes could easily be traced to the owners of the guns involved! :coolsmile:
My point regarding the Founding Fathers was that they existed in a different time, As you said as well. Not every right that was desirable or even necessary at that time is desired or needed today!
You seem to get that RE: slaves, Why not guns! 😖 :coolsmile:
Too be clear some of the best times of my life involve the shooting sports and guns, I DO support the second amendment! I also believe that we MUST as A NATION reform our laws RE: Guns to include Registration and background checks on ALL purchases/purchasers.
I also support an old proposal that was called GUN-DNA, That was the firing and storage of a round from each gun in a database like CODIS.
That way the pieces of evidence left at gun crime scenes could easily be traced to the owners of the guns involved! :coolsmile:
Posted by Tyrusguy on 08/08/14 at 10:27 AM
You go ahead and trust your .gov as much as you want; I absolutely do not. I am totally unwilling to cede them the ability, through registration, to systematically violate my rights, and I've been convinced in the last few years that they are not worthy of my trust. Call it paranoia if you will; it will be much harder to deny them the information once they have it than to do so at the outset. It's what they want to do with the information that is problematic, and why they don't deserve it. Investigators can use the evidence that's available to determine criminal guilt without my information being available to people who don't deserve it. Maybe their job is a little harder, but that's what they're paid for. I object to making it easier for malefactors to abuse my rights.
Posted by Mr Evilwrench on 08/10/14 at 04:42 AM
Evilwrench, You really should see someone about that paranoia you speak of. As my Father once told me, Never argue with drunks or crazy people. Since you have convinced me you fall into the latter group, Goodbye, Have a nice day! :lol: :coolsmile:
Posted by Tyrusguy on 08/10/14 at 10:16 AM
Evilwrench: I don't trust the government, either, but I trust Johnny Random with a gun even less.
Posted by Richard Bos on 08/10/14 at 10:45 AM
Tyrus: Check your premises; if you think I'm crazy, you're too far down the rabbit hole to be saved.
Richard: You're right not to trust the .gov, but check yours, too. You're a lot safer with me than with your typical .gov flunky. Did you read about the IRS agents? They had 11 negligent discharges between 2009 and 2011, some involving injury and property damage. That was more than the intentional discharges during that time. That's like having a car accident more than half the times you start the thing. I have a much better record, with no NDs. I'm just cool that way.
Captcha 45sure, somehow appropriate
Richard: You're right not to trust the .gov, but check yours, too. You're a lot safer with me than with your typical .gov flunky. Did you read about the IRS agents? They had 11 negligent discharges between 2009 and 2011, some involving injury and property damage. That was more than the intentional discharges during that time. That's like having a car accident more than half the times you start the thing. I have a much better record, with no NDs. I'm just cool that way.
Captcha 45sure, somehow appropriate
Posted by Mr Evilwrench on 08/10/14 at 02:23 PM
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