The Snoring Judge, the Motoring Dog, the Concealed Crack Pipe

and the Morning Edition (and only edition today!) of Chuck's News of the Weird Daily for Friday

"Licensing" parents
A legislator in the Netherlands has boldly offered up a partial solution for those of us who have been asking how society can prevent, say, bad cosmetologists from doing further damage, but not the worst-of-the-worst parents. The law would kick in only when a parent screwed up on one or more urchins, but if the gov't then decided a parent was awful, and if they refused contraception, then any future little bundle of their DNA would be confiscated at birth. The list of downsides is lengthy, though, which no doubt means that baseball card collectors are likelier to be rigorously tested than are parents. The Guardian (London)
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People Whose Sex Lives Are Worse Than Yours
Tony Guerra, 20, a former Disney food services worker in the F State, pleaded guilty to possessing a particularly troublesome collection of child porn, and he might as well have because, as you can see from his mugshot, he'd have no chance at trial. [Warning: The second link has some details about the collection that might certainly be TMI] Central Florida News 13 (Orlando) /// Daily Telegraph (Sydney)
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Your Daily Jury Duty
[no fair examining the evidence; verdict must be based on mugshot only]
The police say that Evelyn Russo was concealing a glass crack pipe inside her actual crack, but we'll be the judge of that (of her guilt, not her crack). (Stuart, Fla.)
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More Things to Worry About on Friday

Israel's Supreme Court ruled last week that the planned Museum of Tolerance in Jerusalem could go forward even though part of the site used to be a Muslim graveyard, and now we'll see how tolerant they are of the protests. Associated Press via MSNBC

Australian High Court judges overturned the convictions of two drug traffickers merely because their judge kept falling asleep during the trial (and snoring) (up to 20 minutes at a time). Daily Mail (London)

Recurring Theme: Dog, driving car. Associated Press via Fort Worth Star-Telegram

It says here that golfer Curt Hocker made five holes-in-one last week, giving him seven for the year, and that "15" people have witnessed one or more (Bonus: They're all "friends and family."). Associated Press via Daily Herald (Arlington Heights, Ill.)

Readers' Choice: Another clumsy home-improver (cleaning out cobwebs, with a blowtorch) Times-Herald (Newnan, Ga.)

Comments on More Things to Worry About on Friday?
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Professor Music's Weird Link o' the Day
OK for work but Not Safe For Stomachs because there are some photos: an annotated list of the 28 fattest people of the last 75 yrs or so (and a couple of older ones) (and the heralded Manuel Uribe apparently gained weight too recently to have come to the writer's attention, plus, of course, Uribe slimmed down this year, for his nuptials). Dimensions Magazine
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Editor's Note
Honestly, it's hard to collect the weird news in a week in which so much ink and bandwidth have been sucked out by the monumental U.S. elections (hard, that is, without lowering my standards too much). I mean, we had a local Supervisor of Elections here in Weird Central who announced Wednesday morning that he was comfortably ahead in his re-election vote tally (despite the fact that he was, bar none, the worst candidate for any office on the ballot), which led to hand-wringing by all the local commentators about how stupid we voters could be to re-elect him, and then it turned out yesterday that, oh, by the way, the guy's office didn't count two weeks of heavy early-voting ballots yet. (Sweet irony: When they counted those, he lost by 18,000.) Yikes. Anyway, maybe the news world will get back to normal next week. Tampa Tribune
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Today's Newsrangers: Scott Schrier, Steve Miller, Candy Clouston, Gary Abbott, Mark Neunder
     Posted By: Chuck - Fri Nov 07, 2008

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