The News of the Weird Blog
Angst, Confusion, Cynicism, Ridicule
Hand-Picked and Seasoned by Chuck Shepherd
Friday, February 1, 2013
© 2013 by Chuck Shepherd. All rights reserved.
Sioux Falls, S.D.: Loretta Lacy had to put pedal to metal across Minnesota to get to her granddaughter’s recital in Racine, Wis., even if it meant a speeding ticket. How about four tickets in 2½ hours (88, 88, 99, 112 mph)? She arrived late. Star Tribune (Minneapolis)
Bristol, England: And speaking of relentless, the ever-hardy Derek Edwards, 69, was finally cited on January 8th for soliciting a prostitute--after cops had already caught him for soliciting twice that night. He had only been lectured to in the earlier incidents. swns.com (Bristol)
Bristol, England: And speaking of Bristol, again, a court there has rejected Anthony Gerrard’s appeal, thus keeping his massive porn collection safe, inside police vaults. He had 888 GB of adult porn movies (legal), but included were 11 incidental images of possibly underage models. Thus, police won’t return his computers--because then the police would be “distributing” child porn. (The magistrate had earlier refused to prosecute him for the 11, reasoning that they were probably downloaded mindlessly amongst his humongous adult-porn files.) (Wily Legal Argument: If they gave me my 888 GB back, I’d stay off the vile, disgusting Internet because with my 888 GB, and at age 59, I don’t have that many raging-hormone years left.) (Didn’t work.) ThisIsBristol.com
Connersville, Ind.: Jennifer (a nurse) and Jeff Counceller (cop) found an injured deer, nursed it back to health for two years, and had not gotten around yet to releasing it back into the wild, when the state Dept. of Natural Resources charged them with misdemeanor possession of a deer. The Councellers are getting support from all over the world--but DNR won't let go. Indianapolis Star
TV Program Alert: In case you missed the episode of My Strange Addiction on TLC, you should know that “Lisa” is fine with her habit of licking cat hair. Licking it off of the sofa is OK, but Lisa apparently prefers all-natural (i.e., she grooms, too). Gawker.com
Harare, Zimbabwe: The finance minister reported that the famously inflation-amok country has only $217 in the bank right now. (Buried Ledes: Zimbabwe has a finance minister. He keeps a checkbook register.) (73% of the budget goes to pay bureaucrats and soldiers.) NBC News
[In America, you're presumed innocent . . until the mug shot is released]:
Jefferson County, Mont.: William Province, 42, was accused of waterboarding four boys in his home. Really, does this guy look like he could possibly do such a thing? Montana Standard (Butte)
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