News of the Weird 2.0 (June 4, 2012)

News of the Weird 2.0
(Almost) Daily, Since May 21, 2012

Underreported News, Hand-Picked and Lightly Seasoned by Chuck Shepherd
June 4, 2012
(datelines from May 27 or later) (links correct as of June 4)

★ ★ ★ ★!

Norwegian Dilemma: As NOTW has reported, Norway is home of the most inmate-friendly prison in the world and is generally the gold standard in wrist-slapping wrist-tickling. But now they have this guy Anders Behring Breivik, who undoubtedly massacred 77 people last year. He hasn't been "convicted" yet, but officials are already in a tizzy because the law bans solitary confinement, yet in the general prison population, Breivik may aim to add to his death toll. Solution: Officials are looking for volunteers to be "friends" with Breivik--to be "trained" to hang with him and play chess and stuff. (Bonus: This is how to torture a sociopath. You force him to have "friends." It's a wonder Norwegian liberals allow that.) MSNBC /// NOTW [6-13-2010]


Albany, N.Y.: Andrea Amanatides, 38, processing into jail to do six months on a probation violation, had her condom break and four heroin baggies and 256 Rx pills (including Oxy, Adderall, Valium, etc.) fall to the floor from its hiding place in her hoo-hah. Awkward. Albany Times Union

Mustang, Okla.: CEO Ryan Tate of Tate Publishing Co., fired 25 employees on Thursday, and in a farewell meeting, rubbed their noses in it (after opening the meeting with a prayer). "You morons that sat back and wanted to create and generate conspiracy theories [about the company] are stupid." The Oklahoman

Westlake, Ohio: Sue Warren apparently broke into a stranger's home, tidied it up, then left an invoice for $75. She's done it before. (Bonus: She is apparently serious. There are local ads for "Sue Warren Cleaning" service.) WKYC-TV (Cleveland) via WALB-TV (Albany, Ga.)

Cornelia, Ga.: WSB-TV (aided by the lady's Facebook page) profiles the photogenic Gainesville, Ga., college student, church-goer, and severe anti-gov't type Celia Savage, who is an explosives nut and now faces federal charges for her guns and her boom makers. (Bonus: lives by the Scott Adams quote, "There is no problem that cannot be solved by the use of high explosives") World's Greatest Newspaper

"U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!"

A paper in the journal Cognitive Neuropsychiatry reports that we've become so obsessed with reality TV shows that over on the right tail are at least five super patients with "Truman Show" Delusion--that they've been thrust into a show against their will.

What's Wrong with People? Why do smart people manage money so badly, and why, even when their ignorance is proven, do they keep on? (1) He borrowed $142,000 to go to culinary school but is shocked to find few job opportunities. (2) We thought it was a good thing to invest in a "private equity" fund, to be locked in for 15 yrs yet guarantee to pay you big management fees every year. (3) Gov't workers' pension fund managers are the only people in America now who think their portfolios will average 8% annual returns forever. (But if they cut even 1 point off that, taxpayers would have to make up the difference so, Long Live the 8%!) Yahoo Finance /// Wall Street Journal /// New York Times

Funny Old World*

Sounds Like a Joke: With the euro zone on the verge of imploding, in large part because of Greeks don't produce nearly as much as they've spent, a Pew Global research survey of Europeans revealed that "Germans" are regarded as the hardest workers . . except by Greeks, who think "Greeks" are. The Economist

Editor's Notes

CORRECTIONS: (1) Desmond Hatchett [NOTW2.0, 5-22-2012] is officially "credited" with fathering only 24 children that he can't take care of--not the 30 that he can't take care of reported by local station WVLT-TV in Knoxville, Tenn. (2) Contrary to what I wrote in the weekly News of the Weird column last week (M268, 5-27-2012), prominent "breatharian" Ellen Greve is not dead, which means (inexorably) that she has been cheating on the sun-and-air-only diet that she has promoted for years. I must have misread a 1999 news story and confused Greve with one of her followers, who apparently did not cheat. Knoxville News-Sentinel [link from] /// Wikipedia (Jasmuheen, formerly Ellen Greve)

Thanks to Gary DaSilva, Max Noriega, Jim Bratton, and the mighty NOTW Board of Editorial Advisors. (* stolen from Private Eye)
     Posted By: Chuck - Mon Jun 04, 2012

Andrea Amanatides Chuck, I am so disappointed. You didn't mention there was video! I almost pissed myself.
Posted by Billy on 06/04/12 at 07:36 AM
Andrea's Video Thanks Billy - A MUST SEE

Sue Warren She looks familiar and so does he pa. Seriously!

Cognitive Neuropsychiatry This must have some seriously good effect on TV views if there are only 5 (that's F*I*V*E) crazy reality show viewers. (It ain't real if it ain't SCRIPTED!)

Gov't workers' Y'all know this is one of those oxymoron.

Greeks Y'all think it's easy trying to keep up with Chuck's daily posts???????
Posted by Expat47 in Athens, Greece on 06/04/12 at 09:20 AM
Greeks: it isn't easy coming up with all those ways to dodge taxes.

Andrea: +100 internets to Billy. The fact that all that ... stuff fell out of her pants all at once begs a couple of questions that I really wish hadn't come to mind.

Norwegian prison: I'm surprised they don't have a personal safety clause in the ban on solitary. I mean, what if your cellie is a big Beatles fan, but the answer to "Isn't it good?" is "No."?
Posted by TheCannyScot in Atlanta, GA on 06/04/12 at 10:46 AM
Norwegian prison- The answer is obvious, let the prisoners out and lock up the citizens for their own safety.

Andrea- Practice your kegels honey and that stuff won't happen.

Sue- Check in with the mob, they send in cleaners and pay them without notifying the home owners.

Celia- Praise the Lord and pass the dynamite!

Truman Show- Hell, you can bet those delusions have existed since the movie came out. Real crazies just need an idea, not a lot of encouragement.

Greece- What's wrong with them over there, we gave 'em one of our best and brightest and he has been there for years! Things should be cleared up by now!!

daddy- 24, 30, who's counting after you can no longe name all of them without calling their moms. (Tie a knot in it dude.)

Breatharians- Those dumb enough to follow this fraud to the logical conclusion of the 'faith' are from the shallow end of the gene pool and are Darwinners.
Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 06/04/12 at 11:13 AM
@Patty: One can only do so much. 😕
Posted by Expat47 in Athens, Greece on 06/04/12 at 11:20 AM
Patty, even the gods found the Greeks to be a cantankerous, ornery lot.
Posted by TheCannyScot in Atlanta, GA on 06/04/12 at 02:17 PM
Re: Breatharians

The year 2000 was a banner year for the Ig Nobel Prize. Not only did Jasmuheen win in the literature category, but Dunning and Kruger won in psychology for a widely-cited empirical piece showing that people who aren't good at something also aren't good at recognizing that they aren't any good. Which helps them to stay bad. How many times have you seen a driver cut you off and noticed that the part of the car that they used to cut you off has a huge ding in it? The negative feedback had no effect.

Apparently this is a western trait, as in Asia, the results were different: those who perform poorly realize that they perform poorly. Hence, more possibility for improvement.

"The 2000 Ig Nobel Prize Winners

"PSYCHOLOGY: David Dunning of Cornell University and Justin Kruger of the University of Illinois, for their modest report, "Unskilled and Unaware of It: How Difficulties in Recognizing One's Own Incompetence Lead to Inflated Self-Assessments." [Published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, vol. 77, no. 6, December 1999, pp. 1121-34.]

"LITERATURE: Jasmuheen (formerly known as Ellen Greve) of Australia, first lady of Breatharianism, for her book "Living on Light," which explains that although some people do eat food, they don't ever really need to."
Posted by Harvey on 06/04/12 at 09:53 PM
Harvey, that psych Ig Nobel also goes hand in hand with the Greek story.
Posted by Patty in Ohio, USA on 06/04/12 at 10:21 PM
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