A Weird Universe News Service
March 31, 2017
Problem Solved: The U.S. can look to New Zealand when our new EPA Administrator gets nasty. We get a Greenpeace thug to fistfight ("Queensbury Rules") Scott Pruitt, and the loser has to go wallow in a Superfund pool (say, the Berkeley Pit in Butte, Mont.). [Canadian Broadcasting Corp. Radio]
One moment you're being video-interviewed about how much you love your dog, and the next (almost literally) he tears you apart. [The Guardian]
The "Phone" Thing Gone Too Far: Can't even put it on "airplane mode" long enough to rob a coupla banks? [Milwaukee Journal Sentinel]
Not Pregnant: The Northwestern Univ. researcher who has constructed her own female reproductive system in the lab, using human tissue, announced it just had its first menstrual period! [National Geographic]
Clichés Come to Life: The suspect in the first murder of the year for Berkeley, Calif., Pablo Gomez Jr., apparently insisted that the police report refer to him as "they" rather than "he." [AP via Monterey Herald]
Big-Time Crime in Senoia, Ga. (pop. 3,300): Dennis Smith, 65, was cuffed after he stole (allegedly) some dirt. [WAGA-TV] [OK, well, 6m pounds of it, in 183 dump truck loads]
Can't Possibly Be True: Below the fold in this story, it says that most milk sold in Canada comes in plastic pouches. [That's not true, is it?] [Is it?] [It is?] [Globe and Mail]
Thanks to Sandy Pearlman, Jim Weber, and Mel Birgé.
I used to be a nightowl, but those days are long in the past. So it's going to be a challenge for me to stay awake and remain coherent that late. I'm going to take a nap Saturday afternoon to prepare, and have plenty of coffee on hand.
Posted By: Alex - Fri Mar 31, 2017 -
In 1992 California began requiring that motorcycle riders wear a helmet. Despondent, Gerald Marotta, 48, put on his helmet and shot himself. He left behind a note, "Now I can't ever ride again."
Attorney Wendy Lascher, who had challenged the law, said, "from what I heard about his note, I think the law did have something to do with his death, in that [riding without a helmet] apparently was his only outlet."
Paige Daughtry, 12, is the most recent young person to die from overuse of deodorant. She reportedly used Right Guard deodorant like "it was going out of fashion." She was liberally spraying herself with the stuff in her parent's rented caravan, while the family was on holiday. She sprayed so much that it caused her to pass out, and she couldn't be revived.
As bizarre as it may sound to die from overuse of deodorant, this isn't the first time it's happened. If I had a kid, I don't think I'd let them use the spray stuff. It's toxic. I'd tell them to use solid deodorant, because that kind can't kill you.
2008:12-year-old Daniel Hurley was "always putting gel on his hair and spraying deodorant." He was found collapsed in a bathroom after having sprayed "copious" amounts of Lynx Vice spray.
2015:16-year-old Thomas Townsend of Kent was found collapsed, surrounded by 42 cans of deodorant. His mother said, "He would not take showers but would stand there with a deodorant and spray half the can on him."
"Imagine your phone could communicate with your socks," says the Blacksocks company. But imagine no more, because the company has now created "the smartest men's dress socks in the world." The company admits that, "This is something we dreamed about and we have made the dream come true."
The socks feature a "communication button" that allows the socks to speak to your iPhone. The things your socks might tell your iPhone include:
which socks belong together,and could help sort them out,
how often you have washed your socks,
when your socks were produced,
when you ordered your socks and
when your socks were dispatched.
Your iPhone can also tell you if your black socks are no longer properly black and help you buy new socks.
The smartest socks in the world come with a price tag of $189 for 10 pairs. So $18.90 for each pair.
Irwin Silver put a dress in a can, gave it a frenchified name, and then sold these for $25 a pop. This was back in 1966, and it was a marketing gimmick about as cynical as you might guess. Silver was cashing in on the mid-1960s fad for anything canned, and he figured that if people were stupid enough to buy canned air (i.e. an empty can), perhaps they'd also buy a canned dress. Apparently he sold around 100,000 of them.
More info from the St. Louis Post-Dispatch - Dec 14, 1966:
Everything's packaged in cans these days, even candles and air. But the newest tinned item to roll into stores is "Le Canned Dress," the bright idea of sportswear manufacturer Irwin Silver.
"I was being driven crazy by cans," he says. "Every time I turned around, I seemed to bump into a can. First I saw canned candles, then someone gave me a tin of canned air. I began to wonder why dresses couldn't be put up the same way."...
The fashions produced by Silver's company, Wippette, each weigh 4½ ounces, come packed in gay one-pound cans and are tagged with silver labels designed to look like the top of a can."
Alex is the creator and curator of the Museum of Hoaxes. He's also the author of various weird, non-fiction books such as Elephants on Acid.
Paul Di Filippo
Paul has been paid to put weird ideas into fictional form for over thirty years, in his career as a noted science fiction writer. He has recently begun blogging on many curious topics with three fellow writers at The Inferior 4+1.
Chuck is the purveyor of News of the Weird, the syndicated column which for decades has set the gold-standard for reporting on oddities and the bizarre.
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