One such gem is a Civil Defense "scare" album called THE COMPLACENT AMERICANS that simply must be heard to be believed. This LP - with its bright orange mushroom cloud cover and its hyperbolic advisories to sensitive listeners - could well have been produced by that genius of exploitation William Castle. But actually it was recorded under the stately auspices of the Office of Civil Defense, a sub-branch of the U.S. government (later replaced by FEMA).
Harold Tifft claimed that his portable shield would "protect the wearer against heat, atomic radiation, atomic fall-out and flying debris in the event of nuclear warfare." When not in use it fit inside a carrying case, but when needed it could be rapidly assembled into a full-body shield. From his patent:
The compactness of the shield (due to the telescoping of the various sections) permits the owner thereof to easily carry it with him from place to place. Also, due to its compactness, it can be easily and unobtrusively stored in either the office or the home. When an alarm is sounded by civil defense authorities, civilians who have the described shield close at hand would be able to fit themselves with the shield in a very short period of time. A civilian thus outfitted could then place himself against the floor, the ground, or a vertical surface and wait until the explosion has occurred or the danger passed. The fact that each lower section telescopes with the section next above it enables the wearer to raise as many sections as may be necessary to permit walking or running in the event that the wearer is suddenly forced to abandon his position in favor of a safer one.
In his patent he never mentioned how much the thing weighed. Carrying the thing around constantly would surely have been a challenge.
We have seen instances of this theme before: a giant nuclear mushroom cloud does not indicate death and destruction, but rather it shows your product is powerful.
As the designers admitted, it wasn't going to protect anyone against an atomic bomb or radiation. But as a survival jacket it seemed pretty well equipped. Though a backpack full of the same stuff would seem to be more practical.
"Jean Shore displays inside pocket arrangement of survival jacket." image source: Harry Ransom Center
From what I can gather, this device (a 'geigerscope') would make visible the flashes of radiation given off by radioactive substances such as uranium. But (not mentioned by the ad) it only worked in complete darkness, with a dark-adapted eye. So not a practical way to hunt for uranium deposits.
And if you had uranium in your backyard, you might wanna find somewhere else to live.
In August 1961, Rachel Pinney took the following vow: "I intend to maintain silence on every Wednesday until my country formally renounces Nuclear Weapons. This silence is to be maintained non-violently in the face of any provocation."
Since Pinney worked as a medical doctor, her vow created some awkwardness with the patients she saw on Wednesdays. She had to communicate with them by means of nodding her head, hand signals, and notes (writing prescriptions).
According to her obituary, she maintained the vow for almost 30 years. Of course, the UK still has nuclear weapons.
In 1983, artist Michael Smith followed FEMA's plans and built a Fallout Shelter Snack Bar, which he then displayed as an art installation. To accompany the snack bar, he also created a video game housed in a custom, upright arcade cabinet:
In the game, air sirens blast, and a pixel version of Smith's recurring dopey, tv-dadish "Mike" is charged with moving three blocks from the 1st floor of a suburban house to its basement to create a fallout shelter before the bomb hits (spoiler: it's impossible to win).
The reassuring news, according to Dr. G.D. Kersley, was that if you've had one nuclear bomb dropped on you, you're unlikely to have another.
Kersley's article appeared in the Aug 9, 1958 issue of the British Medical Journal. You can read it here. The reassuring comments are on the final page, in the conclusions section.
Paul Di Filippo
Paul has been paid to put weird ideas into fictional form for over thirty years, in his career as a noted science fiction writer. He has recently begun blogging on many curious topics with three fellow writers at The Inferior 4+1.