Category:
1980s

The Pepsi Navy

In 1989, Pepsi bought 17 submarines from the Soviet Union. This briefly put it in control of the seventh-largest fleet of attack submarines in the world.

Foreign Policy magazine delves into the history of this strange transaction, which has apparently risen to the status of urban legend in foreign policy circles. (The urban legend is that the deal briefly gave Pepsi the sixth-largest military fleet in the world — not true).

The gist of the story is that Pepsi had a long-standing relationship with the Soviet Union, having an exclusive deal to sell American soft drinks there. So when the Soviet Union was looking to sell some old submarines for scrap metal, Pepsi agreed to act as a middleman, passing the subs along to a Norwegian shipping firm. In return, Pepsi got expanded access to the Soviet market.

More details: foreignpolicy.com

Posted By: Alex - Wed Oct 16, 2024 - Comments (1)
Category: Boats, Diplomacy and Foreign Relations, Soda, Pop, Soft Drinks and other Non-Alcoholic Beverages, 1980s

Neutron Radiation Wall

Physicist Samuel T. Cohen is credited with inventing the neutron bomb — a nuclear weapon designed to minimize blast damage but maximize the release of radiation, so that it would kill people but preserve infrastructure.

Cohen later came up with the idea of a neutron radiation wall. This would be a wall of ionizing radiation that would kill anyone who passed through it. He suggested that Israel could build a neutron radiation wall along its border to protect itself from invasion.

He described how this wall would work in a March 1984 article in Reason magazine:

What I am suggesting is the construction of a border barrier whose most effective component is an extremely intense field of nuclear radiation (produced by the operation of underground nuclear reactors), sharply confined to the barrier zone, which practically guarantees the death of anyone attempting to breach the barrier...

Briefly, this is how such a barrier scheme would work:

During peacetime, the reactors (employed underground, for protection and safety) are operated on a continual basis, as are our power reactors. The neutrons produced by the fission reactions escape into a solution containing an element that, upon absorbing the neutrons, becomes highly radioactive and emits gamma rays (very high energy X-rays) at extremely high intensity. The radioactive solution is then passed into a series of pipes running along the barrier length in conjunction with conventional obstacle components—mines, Dragon's Teeth, tank traps, barbed wire, etc. To the rear of the pipes and obstacle belts is a system of conventional defensive fortifications. (The obstacles, the firepower from the fortifications, and tactical air power all serve to impede the rate of advance of the attacker, increasing the attacker's exposure to the gamma radiation. Vice versa, by quickly incapacitating the attacker, the radiation serves to make it difficult, or even impossible, for the attacker to remove the obstacles and assault the fortifications.) The width of the entire defensive system need be no more than a few miles.

The gamma ray field in the immediate vicinity of the obstacle zone readily can be sufficiently intense that several minutes' exposure will produce incapacitation and ultimately death. However, at a distance of, say, 1,000 yards from the pipes, the radiation intensity is so reduced that people are perfectly safe. In fact, a person could stand all day at this distance without putting himself in jeopardy.

Posted By: Alex - Wed Sep 25, 2024 - Comments (3)
Category: Atomic Power and Other Nuclear Matters, 1980s, Weapons

Neck-Exercising Device

Patent No. 4,832,333



Posted By: Alex - Mon Sep 23, 2024 - Comments (0)
Category: Exercise and Fitness, Patents, 1980s

Politician promises weight loss

A low-ambition campaign promise: Adeline Geo-Karis promised that, if elected Comptroller of Illinois, she would lose 50 pounds. She didn't win.

Bloomington Pantagraph - May 23, 1986

Posted By: Alex - Thu Sep 05, 2024 - Comments (1)
Category: Politics, 1980s, Dieting and Weight Loss

The Outdoors Girl of Canada

The earliest reference I find is the one below, from 1955. The latest is from 1989. A respectable 40-year run. But too few pictures of the winners!






Posted By: Paul - Mon Sep 02, 2024 - Comments (1)
Category: Beauty, Ugliness and Other Aesthetic Issues, Contests, Races and Other Competitions, Nature, Day Camps, Away Camps, Outdoor Activities and Recreational Retreats, 1950s, 1980s, North America

The Shrink

Poetry of the insane?

Why do you think you are nuts?

Are you nuts? Are you nuts? Have you lost your guts?

Why do you think you are nuts?

Posted By: Alex - Fri Aug 16, 2024 - Comments (0)
Category: Music, Television, Psychology, 1980s, Mental Health and Insanity

New Hoover Deluxe Shampoo Polishers

Jeff Koons's 1987 "sculpture" is titled "New Hoover Deluxe Shampoo Polishers, New Shelton Wet/Dry 5-Gallon Displaced Quadradecker." It consists of a stack of six shampoo polishers and one wet/dry vacuum.

I wonder if the work was inspired in any way by the persistent weird news theme of 'art mistaken as trash.' Instead of art that resembles trash, Koons imagined cleaning supplies as art.

Yeah, I'm probably overthinking this.

New Hoover Deluxe Shampoo Polishers, New Shelton Wet/Dry 5-Gallon Displaced Quadradecker
image source: wikiart

Posted By: Alex - Mon Aug 12, 2024 - Comments (1)
Category: Art, 1980s

Combined Woodworker’s Push-Stick and Furniture Alarm Unit

British inventor David Bartram was granted a UK patent (GB2233932A) in 1989 for his "woodworker's push-stick and furniture alarm unit."

In its first possible use, as a push-stick, his invention allowed woodworkers to push pieces of wood through a table saw while keeping their hand safely away from the saw blade.



In its second possible use, as a furniture alarm, the stick could be attached in between the legs of a chair. If the occupant of the chair happened to lean backwards, raising the front legs of the chair off the ground, the furniture alarm would emit a "startling warning."



Bartram clearly was annoyed by people who leaned backwards in chairs. He wrote:

This strains, loosens and can ultimately destroy, the chair joints. Quite apart from the fact that the chairs were not intended for such use, the costs nowadays of stripping and repairing a chair whose joints have become loosened can be high.

Of course, for his invention to function as a furniture alarm some kind of "gravity-orientated switch" would need to be incorporated into it. Based on his patent description, it's not clear if Bartram had ever gone to the trouble of doing this, but it seems that he didn't anticipate it would be a problem.

He didn't address the major limitation of his two-in-one invention: if you've got it attached to the legs of a chair it's not available to use as a push-stick, and vice versa, if it's in your workshop being used as a push-stick, it's not guarding a chair.

Posted By: Alex - Wed Jul 31, 2024 - Comments (4)
Category: Furniture, Patents, 1980s

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Alex is the creator and curator of the Museum of Hoaxes. He's also the author of various weird, non-fiction, science-themed books such as Elephants on Acid and Psychedelic Apes.

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