It turns out that there is a serious debate being waged as to whether lobsters can really be hypnotized. One scientist I spoke to said that a lobster can be "tonically immobilized," but not hypnotized. As far as I can tell, tonic immobilization just means that after being rubbed on the top of its shell, just behind its eyes, the lobster seems to lose any will to move and can be stood on its beak and claws in a kind of tripod arrangement. And the lobster seems content to just stay like this, balanced on its beak and claws. But I don't speak lobster, so it's really hard to say what is on the mind of a tonically immobilized lobster that has been forced to do a headstand.

Some people swear this ritual makes the meat taste better if the lobster is thrown into the boiling water while still under "hypnosis." We carried out a double-blind taste test on our back porch one evening, and I thought all the boiled lobster tasted great.

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CAUTION: This recording is for right handed bowlers only. It is unique in its field, and should not be played until you have read the instructions carefully on the reverse side of the jacket.

INSTRUCTIONS
1. Listen to the record in solitude or free from distraction.
2. Listen to the record while in a relaxed, comfortable position.
3. This recording has been specifically designed to adapt to the schedule of the busy executive or career woman. Side No. 1 may be listened to at any time on any conventional 33-1/3 R.P.M. phonograph. Side No. 2 has been developed to be used on any 33-1/3 R.P.M. automatic player, and when used with a clock radio or timer, will accommodate those who do not have time for daytime listening. Listen for one hour at bedtime. Make certain your record player is set to repeat.

A psychological conditioning program guaranteed to improve your game through the application of auto-conditioning techniques in the areas of : Relaxation, Confidence, Concentration, Coordination.

FOR RIGHT-HANDED GOLFERS ONLY!