Category:
Skin and Skin Conditions

Instant Facelift Device

In 1971, Leah Heale of San Jose, CA was granted Patent No 3,575,165 for this rather uncomfortable looking "facelift device." From the patent:

A facelift device adapted to be worn on the head in a manner that it may be covered by a wig, the facelift device including an anchor portion adapted to be engaged by the ends of a multiplicity of tension members, the other ends of which are selectively secured to the wearer's skin closely adjacent the hairline and in a position to tension the skin to eliminate lines and wrinkles therefrom.



A discussion of it New Scientist magazine (Aug 15, 1974):

Since opportunity has not yet been afforded for scientific examination of a wrinkled lady wearing this face-lifting top-knot, judgement of its efficacy can only be theoretical. But there does seem the psychological danger that its wearers would suffer under the delusion that they were being continually assailed by scalp-hunting Sioux Indians.

And according to researchers in the General Motors laboratories examining the reactions of the human body in accident situations, some expertise may be vital in judging the degree of tension applied to the temple-grippers. The GM people reported that the scalp, notably tough and elastic, can stand forces up to 610 lb per square inch before tissue damage sets in. Facial covering is less resistant and that over the cheekbones shows wear and tear at a load of 208 lb. So tensing the scalp-hackles to anything much over a third of their overhead capacity might well result in the beauty-seeker finding herself instead with her nose coming away at the seams and her ears getting a divorce from her cranium.

And even if all tensilities were precisely adjusted, one cannot banish the feeling that the taut-faced beauty, though smoother-cheeked than any baby's bottom, would have her brows so steeply arched and her eyes so shockingly widened that she would spend her day bearing a look of permanent surprise and with the mien of one who is being externally goosed.

Posted By: Alex - Thu Sep 01, 2022 - Comments (1)
Category: Beauty, Ugliness and Other Aesthetic Issues, Patents, 1970s, Skin and Skin Conditions

Knee-Cleaning Foam

They should sell this stuff at home improvement stores, because whenever I do a DIY project I somehow always end up with filthy knees.

The Minologi Hizaawana Foam Clear Pack will form a bubbly layer over your knees and elbows and work its magic for 10-15 minutes. After that you just peel it off and discover what the real color of your skin was underneath those pesky dirt particles. You'll never feel cleaner!

Available from Japan Trend Shop.





via Book of Joe

Posted By: Alex - Mon Aug 29, 2022 - Comments (3)
Category: Hygiene, Baths, Showers and Other Cleansing Methods, Skin and Skin Conditions

Love lost due to “middle-age” skin

What foolishness to grow older!

1938 - NY Times. Via Duke University



Posted By: Alex - Wed Jun 29, 2022 - Comments (1)
Category: Advertising, 1930s, Skin and Skin Conditions

Reading Position For A Second Degree Burn

For somewhere between $15,000 to $20,000 you can buy a photograph showing the sunburn that artist Dennis Oppenheim got on Long Island beach in 1970.

According to wikipedia:

Oppenheim describes the piece as a corporeal enactment of painting, going on to state "I could feel the act of becoming red."

Posted By: Alex - Sun Nov 21, 2021 - Comments (1)
Category: Art, Photography and Photographers, 1970s, Skin and Skin Conditions

Rubber Snow Mitts

There's a good reason these never caught on: I'm sure the wearer's hands were as clammy as dead fish within seconds of wearing them.

Source.

Even the modern version that appears next has some breathable fabric, and is specially for work, not snowball fights.

Source.



Posted By: Paul - Wed Feb 12, 2020 - Comments ()
Category: Inventions, Seasonal, Pain, Self-inflicted and Otherwise, Skin and Skin Conditions

Skin On

Making trackpads feel more like human skin...

More info: marcteyssier.com



Posted By: Alex - Wed Oct 30, 2019 - Comments ()
Category: Inventions, Technology, Skin and Skin Conditions

Follies of the Madmen #361



From THE AMERICAN LEGION MAGAZINE for June 1959.

Posted By: Paul - Mon Apr 23, 2018 - Comments (3)
Category: Business, Advertising, Innuendo, Double Entendres, Symbolism, Nudge-Nudge-Wink-Wink and Subliminal Messages, 1950s, Skin and Skin Conditions

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Alex Boese
Alex is the creator and curator of the Museum of Hoaxes. He's also the author of various weird, non-fiction, science-themed books such as Elephants on Acid and Psychedelic Apes.

Paul Di Filippo
Paul has been paid to put weird ideas into fictional form for over thirty years, in his career as a noted science fiction writer. He has recently begun blogging on many curious topics with three fellow writers at The Inferior 4+1.

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