Category:
Patents

Square-Wheeled Tank

In 1957, Albert Sfredda secured a patent (No. 2,786,540) for a square-wheeled tank. He explained:

A vehicle equipped with square wheels of the type contemplated by my invention gives better traction and a smoother ride when used on rough terrain than one having circular wheels. Following are the reasons: the sides of a square wheel constitute large flat surfaces for bridging ruts and cavities in the ground whereas a circular wheel follows the surface of the ground and enters many ruts; and the sides of a square wheel provide a large contacting area with the ground when they lie parallel thereto, and, hence, afford better pushing effect, whereas a round wheel affords only a small pushing area, which often results in causing a digging effect.



Sfredda was correct that square wheels would provide better traction on rough terrain than circular wheels would. The video below explains why. But the problem, of course, was that his tank would have difficulty moving on a regular, flat road.



Along similar lines, Macalester College has had a square-wheeled bicycle on permanent display since 1997. More info: macalester.edu

image source: StanWagon.com

Posted By: Alex - Wed Jul 21, 2021 - Comments (2)
Category: Motor Vehicles, War, Weapons, Patents, 1950s

Weird alien sounds designed to terrify and panic

In 1969, Alfred Mardarello et al. were granted a patent for a "noisemaking device" which could be attached to a missile. When the missile was fired and flying through the air, their gadget would create "weird, alien sounds" intended to terrify the enemy. From their patent:

The invention relates to a projectile that is adapted to produce frightening noises while in flight, whereby such alien sounds will have a terrrifying effect on people nearby.

The psychological effects of weird or unexpected noises, which accompany an artillery projectile or missile, have been explored in many ways, prior to this invention, with minimum results. The Germans, in World War II, attached a noise producing device to aerial bombs, somewhat similar in construction to the organ pipe. A high pitched noise was created. This could be used only on large bombs and was too massive for use on artillery projectiles...

The insufficiencies of the prior art are overcome by the noisemaking adapter of the instant invention. The adapter ring is so designed that they attach to an existant missile without requiring modification of said missile. Centrifugal force, as a result of the spinning motion of the missile after being fired, causes the noisemaking arms or fins to extend and to produce weird, alien sounds of such magnitude as to be heard over a substantial area. The psychological effect, to create panic to those in the vicinity, is thus effected.

I have no idea if this patent was ever used in combat. But I don't really understand the point of making something that's already terrifying (a missile) even more terrifying by having it produce weird, alien sounds. Isn't the terror of the missile itself enough?

I guess it was part of the psychological warfare effort during Vietnam. See also Ghost Tape Number Ten.

Posted By: Alex - Sun Jul 11, 2021 - Comments (5)
Category: Patents, 1960s, Weapons, Cacophony, Dissonance, White Noise and Other Sonic Assaults

Uncle Sam Eagle

Happy Fourth of July!

Mary E. Harris of San Francisco was so proud of her patriotic idea of grafting the face of Uncle Sam onto the body of a bald eagle, that she decided to patent it, receiving US Design Patent No. 51415 in 1917.

Posted By: Alex - Sun Jul 04, 2021 - Comments (2)
Category: Art, Holidays, Patriotism, Patents

Horse Spike

In 1899, Patent No. 636,430 was granted to Franz and Konrad Hieke of Philadelphia for what they described as "cavalry equipment". It was essentially a large spike attached to the front of a horse. From their patent:

This invention relates to cavalry equipment; and it has for its object the provision of novel means for protecting the horse from the missiles of the enemy and in the provision of a cutting projection designed to injure the enemy or cause him to evade the projection by stepping to one side where an attack by the rider would be effective.



A better view:

Argos Reflector - Feb 8, 1900



I wonder if one of these was ever actually used in combat?

Posted By: Alex - Tue Jun 22, 2021 - Comments (3)
Category: Animals, Inventions, Patents, Weapons, Nineteenth Century

Staying awake at the wheel

Over the years, inventors have dreamed up a variety of ways to keep drivers awake while driving.

In 1936, Carl Brown got a patent on a chin-operated alarm device. If a driver started to nod off, and his head fell forward, this would depress a trigger, setting off an electric bell that would wake him up. (Patent No. 2,066,092)



In 1940, Raymond Young had the idea that whenever a driver was feeling drowsy he could press a button on the steering wheel and this would squirt an aromatic spray in his face, waking him up. (Patent No. 2,199,060)



And just last month, Hyundai was granted a patent for a system that shoots ultrasonic beams at a driver's eyes when it senses he's falling asleep. (Patent No. 11007932)

Posted By: Alex - Mon Jun 14, 2021 - Comments (3)
Category: Inventions, Patents, Sleep and Dreams, Cars

Urine-Collecting Shoe

Problem: you're out in public and really need to go to the bathroom, but there are no toilets around.
Solution: the urine-collecting shoe, patented by Ran Rahimzada in 2008.

As described in his patent:

An embarrassing situation may arise, when people sometimes need to urinate and there may not be toilets readily available, for example when a person is driving a car on a highway, while touring a city with not public toilets readily accessible, while traveling in a bus, etc...

According to the present invention, a new shoe includes a container to store a person's urine. The person may use a standard catheter, which is connected to the container in the shoe.

This is an unobtrusive device, there is no bag attached to one's foot, etc. The device may be used discreetly, without attracting undue attention.

Posted By: Alex - Sun May 30, 2021 - Comments (1)
Category: Inventions, Patents, Body Fluids, Shoes

Field Umbrella

Patent No. 2,320,848 was granted to Hollie Lee Byars of Parrish, Alabama for an umbrella designed to protect people stooped over. She imagined it would be useful for field workers. Although anyone who spent a lot of time hunched over could benefit.

There have been times when I've been weeding my yard that I could have used something like this.

Posted By: Alex - Fri May 21, 2021 - Comments (3)
Category: Inventions, Patents, 1940s, Weather

Animating Plants

Many people talk to their plants, but the plants don't talk back. However, a new invention allows the plants not to talk back, but at least to communicate, by moving. For instance, you could ask a plant if it needed to be watered, and the plant would shake up and down to indicate 'yes'.

From the patent granted to Richard J. Maddocks et al:

The present invention can provide a method and a system for the human interaction with plants. The present invention can also provide a method and a mechanism to animate by physically moving the plant in response to human voice or touch input. Additionally, the present invention can provide a commercially practicable method for humans or machines to assign personalities that will govern the plant's behavior.

The invention can provide an opportunity for retailers, distributors or gift givers to customize the behavior and content of the plant's behavior.

The present invention can provide a technique for the plant through its behavior to communicate its physiological needs for irrigation, light, fertilizer etc.



Posted By: Alex - Sun May 09, 2021 - Comments (2)
Category: Communications, Inventions, Patents, Nature, Technology

Combined hat and comb

In 1920, Alva Dawson of Florida was granted a patent for a "combined head covering and hair comb". In his patent he explained:

Among the objects of the invention is to provide a combined head covering and comb so constructed and arranged that the wearer of the head covering may comb up his hair coincidentally with the removal of the head covering from his head, and hence without rendering himself conspicuous in so doing.

I'm pretty sure it wasn't possible to use this hat-comb without rendering yourself very conspicuous.



Popular Science - Oct 1920

Posted By: Alex - Sun May 02, 2021 - Comments (0)
Category: Patents, Headgear, 1920s, Hair and Hairstyling

A Horn for Airplanes

Invented by Charles Adler, Jr. of Baltimore and granted a patent in 1947.

I imagine the last thing you'd want to hear as your flight is cruising at 30,000 feet is the pilot suddenly honking the horn.

Though, of course, the horn was intended for small planes, not passenger jets.

Adler himself used it to nag his wife by flying low over his house and honking the horn so that she'd know to start preparing his dinner.



Massillon Evening Independent - Aug 1, 1946

Posted By: Alex - Sun Apr 25, 2021 - Comments (3)
Category: Inventions, Patents, Air Travel and Airlines, 1940s

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Alex Boese
Alex is the creator and curator of the Museum of Hoaxes. He's also the author of various weird, non-fiction, science-themed books such as Elephants on Acid and Psychedelic Apes.

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