Category:
Patents

Cremation by solar power

Patent #US4781174A:

Heat rays of the sun are concentrated and focussed by means of a reflective and/or lenticular device at a focal point for the purpose of the cremation of corpses, and their reduction to ashes thereby, either as a system per se or in combination with various ancillary buildings, equipment and facilities, more particularly an auditorium structure for conducting a funeral service or the like and from which a corpse may be transferred to the focal point of the concentrating device preferably by elevating the corpse through an opening in the ceiling and/or roof of the structure.

Seems like something a James Bond villain would create, if he were in the funeral business.



Posted By: Alex - Mon Jul 02, 2018 - Comments (7)
Category: Death, Inventions, Patents, 1980s

Hat Guard

Back in the day when the theft of hats from hatracks was an ongoing problem, Frank P. Snow of Los Angeles patented this invention designed to inflict pain on any would-be hat thieves.

A thief could take the hat, but if he tried to put it on, a "guarding prong" would jab into his skull. The prong locked in place and could only be moved if you knew the code to the combination lock.

Official Gazette of the United States Patent Office - June 2, 1914

Posted By: Alex - Thu Jun 14, 2018 - Comments (2)
Category: Inventions, Patents, Headgear, 1910s

Open Zipper Alarm

US Patent Application No. 2009/0195400A1 describes an invention that can "provide a warning or alert regarding the position of the zipper."

Sounds potentially useful. What kind of warning does it give you? Apparently you've got a choice of a sound, vibration, having a page sent to a remote device, or getting an electric shock.

Posted By: Alex - Sat Jun 09, 2018 - Comments (5)
Category: Inventions, Patents

Inflatable Coffin

Patented by Clifford Malbon of Daytona Beach, Florida in 1977. Patent # US4050125A. From the patent abstract:

An inflated casket which may remain deflated for storage prior to use and for transportation prior to storage. The casket body is provided with one or a plurality of chambers into which a fluid substance is injected for distending the chambers to cause the casket body to assume an erect position for use. The fluid substance while usually in the form of a gas, such as air, may constitute a substance which will subsequently solidify to produce a substantially rigid casket body.



Naples Daily News - Dec 11, 1977

Posted By: Alex - Fri Jun 01, 2018 - Comments (5)
Category: Death, Inventions, Patents, 1970s

Urinal Forehead Support


U.S. Patent No. 6,618,419.

Abstract: A forehead support apparatus for resting a standing users forehead against a wall above a bathroom commode or urinal or beneath a showerhead. The apparatus includes a mounting member adapted for attachment to an upright bathroom wall either above the commode or urinal or below the showerhead.

Posted By: Alex - Tue Mar 06, 2018 - Comments (8)
Category: Bathrooms, Inventions, Patents

Shed Defender

AKA leotards for dogs. Available at sheddefender.com.

The patent pending Shed Defender is intended to be worn in the house, car, or anywhere you don’t want dog hair, dirt, dander, and allergens. Made from premium eco-friendly fabric that is lightweight and breathable to ensure the dog stays safe, cool and comfortable. Four-way stretch fabric allows the dog to move freely.


Posted By: Alex - Tue Jan 09, 2018 - Comments (3)
Category: Fashion, Patents, Dogs

Greenhouse Helmet

Patented in 1986 by Waldemar Anguita of Brooklyn, NY. And I'm not sure, but this may be Waldemar's Twitter account. After all, how many Waldemar Anguitas of approximately the right age can there be in Brooklyn?

A principle object of the present invention is to provide a greenhouse helmet designed to contain plants secured within and the helmet worn completely over the head of a person so that the person can breathe in the oxygen given off by the plants.

Another object is to provide a greenhouse helmet that has air filters so that ambient air containing carbon dioxide will be filtered therethrough and mixed with the carbon dioxide breathed out by the person to be used by the plants.

An additional object is to provide a greenhouse helmet that will contain hearing and speaking devices so that the person can hear within and speak out through the helmet.

A further object is to provide a greenhouse helmet that is economical in cost to manufacture.

A still further object is to provide a greenhouse helmet that is simple and easy to use.


Posted By: Alex - Wed Dec 27, 2017 - Comments (3)
Category: Inventions, Patents, 1980s

Atomic Bomb Car



In 1953, Corwin D. Willson of Flint, Michigan patented the Atomic Bomb Car. Though the official title on the patent was a "sedan having versatile structure."

His idea was that if the United States were "atomically attacked," people would need to flee the cities, and then they'd have to live in their cars. But most cars aren't designed to be lived in. The solution: turn cars into mobile bomb shelters that could provide temporary housing for people. Essentially, he was patenting a camper car, but he was trying to market it as a defense against atomic attack.

From the patent:

Obviously, today's family car, while as numerous as dwellings, would fail, under threat of atomic attack, to meet the needs of millions of families simultaneously for widely diffused family shelter during an emergency probably timed to occur in mid-winter and to be of some duration. yet, once some practical: i.e., simple and economically possible, means is found for making the average car quickly convertible to housekeeping use, then the threat of the atom bomb to our cities loses some of its menace.

And also:

It is commonly acknowledged that the physical structures of congested areas are doomed once atomically attacked, The real problem is: how sensibly to save the lives of the inhabitants of cities thus marked for destruction and temporarily house them so that the business of resistance may go on in spite of the chaos engendered? Americans own as many motorcars as dwellings: 30,000,000 cars. If these cars were built as taught herein and if the civilian masses, against whom the next war acknowledgedly will be waged, were trained to diffuse in an orderly fashion to points prepared in advance and to occupy their convertible motorcars as temporary family dwellings till the danger passed, then one of the greatest problems to face the coming generation would have found a simple, economically sound and eminently satisfying solution.

More info: JF Ptak Science Books, Patent #US2638374A

Posted By: Alex - Mon Mar 27, 2017 - Comments (1)
Category: Inventions, Patents, Atomic Power and Other Nuclear Matters, 1950s

Downunder Lipstick Glue

Glue for the lips "downunder."

More info: NY Post, Forbes, Patent Office

Posted By: Alex - Thu Feb 23, 2017 - Comments (2)
Category: Hygiene, Body Fluids, Patents, Blood, Genitals

Japanese Typewriters

The first Japanese typewriter was invented in 1915 by Kyota Sugimoto. By the 1920s these typewriters had begun to be used by Japanese businesses. The San Jose history blog gives a description of how they worked:

The letter tray, which Sugimoto called a “type-nest” in the patent application, is an array of 70 X 35 cells. Each cell holds a metal letterpress-style type, for a total of 2450 characters. Fifty characters were used for numbers, punctuation, etc. and the 2400 remaining Kanji characters satisfied most business requirements, even though the Japanese language uses over 100,000 unique characters. Knowledge of about 2400 characters is required for a high school diploma in Japan, so this is a reasonable compromise for this typewriter.

The paper cylinder and typing mechanism are on ball-bearing rollers, forming a very complex mechanical marvel. Using a Bakelite knob, the operator can move this mechanism left to right or up and down above the type-nest and position the striker over the selected character. Pressing down on the knob causes a pin under the type-nest to push up the selected type block, which is grasped by the striker from above. The striker rotates the type block 90 degrees over a small ink wheel and then strikes the paper. The striker then returns to its original position, dropping the type block back into the type-nest.

The Gatunka blog notes, "The beginning of the end for Kanji typewriters was heralded by the arrival of affordable digital word processors in 1984. By the mid 90s, personal computers also began to become popular in Japanese homes, and the age of kanji typewriters came to an end."

The Whitewright Sun - June 14, 1928



source: Wikimedia Commons



source: Wikimedia Commons

Posted By: Alex - Sun Jan 15, 2017 - Comments (6)
Category: Inventions, Patents

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Alex is the creator and curator of the Museum of Hoaxes. He's also the author of various weird, non-fiction, science-themed books such as Elephants on Acid and Psychedelic Apes.

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